Developing Effective Communication Part 1

Well, this is the beginning of our 21st annual Bible conference. It's been part of our tradition to have a Bible conference each year and to have one of God's servants come and minister the Word of God to us. Dr. Ellen comes to us from Houston, Texas. I got to know him probably about 10 years now. I had met him in Houston.

I was down there. We were both teaching at an ANC training event, and that's when I first met him. And then our paths kept crossing at the annual conferences, and then he and I would be teaching together at a number of these training events across the country. And so over the years, I got to know him pretty well. And last year, I was thinking, boy, you know, it'd be great to get Nick here and minister the word.

And he agreed to do it. now he's probably having second thoughts now with the snow he kept telling us yesterday i was sitting in my shorts in 82 degrees weather before i left but nick has a has a as a way of communicating the word i've also had the privilege of sitting under his teaching a number of times and i've been blessed and been taught some things that I really needed to hear. And so I'm praying that God will use him in our life here as our church to teach us some things that God expects us to know and to learn and to become more like Jesus. So Nick, come and minister the word of God to us.

Good morning to you all. Let me just start by saying that Tim is my brother from another mother, in case you guys didn't know that. He's just a little bit taller. That's the only difference between us. I'm truly excited to be here with you for these few days. As soon as I got out of the airport, I said, man, I'm not in Texas anymore.

That wind came from that plane. I was like, my goodness, I did not prepare. But I been inside It nice and warm So I actually okay I took pictures of snow I don get to see snow much so I took pictures so my wife could see hey honey it real snow outside It not the fake stuff This is real So it's been an honor so far. I have been spoiled by the savages. Thank you guys so much.

I'm living, they said it was a basement, like a dungeon. They were scaring me on the way. I get down there and it's a wonderful, wonderful place. I've just been relaxing. and I had to force myself to get up because you guys would have missed it. I was comfortable. But I wanted to say thank you so much for allowing me the privilege of being here with you.

I hope that we can learn together as we look at God's word, and I think it could be a blessing for all of us. So every now and again, you know I'm a black preacher, so every now and again throw a little amen out there for me. Make me feel at home. I may have to get you to do this and go amen. Now, I was checking with Tim. This is not a one-shouting-you're-out church, is it?

So we're okay? Not a one shout and you're out? It's okay. All right, just check it. I want to feel the pulse. Make sure you're okay.

Well, let's pray and let's go to God's word together. Father, we thank you so much for your grace and mercy. Lord, I thank you for this church. I thank you for all that you're doing here for the leaders and for those who love you and come and are part of this particular ministry. Would you bless our time together? And would you help us, Lord, to not only see what you want us to see from your word, But Lord God, that we can begin to live it out in practice.

Forgive us of our sins and would you bless this time we ask in Jesus name. Amen. As I was thinking about this whole concept of communication and looking at what I do as a living as far as pastoring and teaching and working with people. It's amazing because no matter where I go in the country of the world, it's still the same challenges of communication.

It doesn't matter who the people are. And I remember talking with one couple and we were just sitting down and they were frustrated about a few things and they just kept going on and on and on and on. And I finally stopped them. I said, you know what, guys? You don't really have a communication problem. You have an interpretation problem.

And even in your interpretation problem, it's not really so much interpretation as it is a condition of your heart. and I think that we need to get back to the basics of understanding what God intended for your communication and they just kind of gave me that blank stare and I thought man if if this is this one couple I wonder if I were to talk to the entire congregation and say the same thing what it would be like And so I began to look at particular passages and just try to think about what God would have us to see with communication. And I was heavily convicted that as the body of believers, as we are, the way we talk sometimes, you would question if Jesus is really on the throne. And I think about when we're on our jobs, the mumbling, the groaning, the complaining, the squabbling, and the things that I hear, and I'm thinking, my goodness, if someone were to hear my communication, would they know that I belong to Christ?

Or do I look and sound like everybody else? And so my challenge to you, as I've been challenged through this, is let's explore together God's goal for our communication. Let's begin to look at areas of our lives where we say, you know what if I want to be honest with myself God is not on the throne when I talk about this subject or if I want to be honest God is not on the throne when I'm dealing with this particular person because here's something you got to think about in all of your communication the condition of the relationships that you have or had boiled down to how you've been running your mouth you ever thought about that I mean there are certain people now you will not speak to because of the way there was communication.

There are certain people you run from because they talk too much. You know that person, right? As soon as you see them coming on Sunday, you go, you know, got to go because they don't know how to use communication to God's glory. And some people you talk to don't talk enough to where you really don't know where their hearts are. And God has a balance for us, and I want us to explore that together.

But before we do that, I want you to look with me in your notes and let's explore a definition because it's hard to teach something that you can't really define. Would you agree? And I think sometimes we have a misunderstanding of what communication truly is. So in your notes, if you would look with me, here's our basic definition that we will spring from to explain and articulate and understand communication. communication can be defined as the transferring and receiving of information so that individuals may understand and respond in the proper way to the information resulting in an increased commonness of understanding and a proper functioning amongst one another and in life accordingly Can I just summarize that and give you a big picture Communication is not just words it a connecting of people through the words.

If we understand that big picture, God never intended communication just to be about a transferring of information. It was always about connecting people satan understood that from the beginning so guess what the very thing that god used to try to connect is the very thing that satan would use to try to divide and i don't know about you but i've been in many places in many churches where words can be magnified to mean things that they never intended to mean and it creates the confusion and disorder and everything that we see as we talk in the book of James. But God meant for words to be used as a way to connect us to him and to connect us to each other.

I want you to explore with me just for a moment some of this understanding of communication. Notice the words, letter A, communication comes from the root word communis, communis. It's a common and public connection shared by people. Now if you think about communication and you just take that word, you see all different little things like community and and commune.

All of that is coming from the concept of communication, which is an implication for us. God wanted our words to bring people together. God wanted our words to connect people in a way that is God-honoring as he intended. But secondly, I want you to notice communication was not intended to be the reduction to just transmitting of facts. Now, before we go any further.

I want you to think about that for a moment. How many of you know people that all they can do is just tell you information? You ever met people like that? I call it the Jesus talk. You ever met those people? They talk a lot of Jesus talk, and they don't really live it, but man, they talk Jesus whenever you meet them.

I've got some people like that around me. Oh man, praise the Lord, brother. Hallelujah. You know, God is so good, and they never talk about sports or, you know, anything, but it's that fake Jesus talk. It's not the, I really love him. It's the, I think this is how I'm supposed to talk.

And I always think, you know, and they've always got a lot of information to share, but they don't share their hearts. They're not talking about, here is how God is working in my life through the context of what I've heard. Here is what God is doing with me. Here's how God is changing me. It's just jabbering about information. And God never intended for us to connect that way.

How many of you find yourself sometimes not really sharing your heart, but just sharing words? How many of you find sometimes that you know how to talk, but the talk that you're talking is not really who you are? And it's only when you get mad that the real you comes out. you know what i've learned if you really want to know how a person thinks about you wait till they get mad because then there's no holds barred have you noticed that they put it all on the line you say oh is that true sure an abundance of the heart the mouth speaks doesn't it know what the bible says and you get to see where a person really is and i'm thinking wow you had to get mad to share that with me you couldn't share your heart in a loving and open way God intended for it to be more than just facts but a connecting together let's look at another point with this communication was meant to be an involvement of people on a common and public level and the sharing of information the building of commonness of understanding in other words letter d tools transmits facts people get involved when we understand this about communication we can begin to explore theologically the nature of this concept of communication and we get back to the basics we get back to the reality of what was God's goal for our words what was God's goal for you and I when he spoke from heaven to Adam what was God's goal when he wants us to speak to one another when we speak to him what does God intend for us how does God get the greatest glory from you and ours communication.

I want you to look with me at point number two, and we're going to get on what we call the Bible bus. You guys ever been on the Bible bus? It's really fun. We just gump and jump through all these scriptures. We just ride around, and we just see all these wonderful passages. So I want you to get ready to ride this Bible bus with me.

You ready to go? All right, open your Bibles. Let's jump on this Bible bus. And you know our first stop, right? It's the stop that we should all do. Every good Christian has a stop in Genesis, right?

I mean, you're just not a preacher if you don't stop by the book of Genesis every now and again. All right, look at the book of Genesis with me. And here's what we want to understand. Communication comes from God We got to go there because if not it just becomes this fluffy psychobabble you know, let's speak words that just make everybody feel good, fluffy stuff and that's not what God intended.

God intended for words to hit in a certain manner to His glory and if it means to rebuke us, great, if it's meant to challenge us, encourage us, God has a purpose for words. But notice, let's just skip around a little bit. Look at chapter 1, verse 1 of Genesis. It says, in the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was formless and void, and darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was moving over the surface of the waters.

I want you to notice verse 3, then God what? Said. Now, go down to verse 6. It says, then God said. Okay, now go down to verse 9. It says, then God, huh.

Verse 11 says, then God, you guys are getting good at this. Verse 14, it says, then God, okay. And then, let's see, we go on down to verse 20, then God, okay. Any idea what it's in verse 24, than God? All right. Verse 26, than God?

Okay. Oh, even the children get this now. All right. I love it. Verse 28, God bless them and God? All right.

Verse 29, than God? So any idea where communication comes from? Anybody tell me? Comes from God. So here is God who is speaking things into existence by the way he's the only one that can do that in case you haven't heard you know many people want to speak things into existence if i could do that money cometh now you know if it was real god is the only one that does this but god is the pattern for us to consider with our communication but with that being said notice in genesis 2 around verse 15 it says then the Lord God took the man put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it the Lord God commanded the man what the next word saying notice the first words that God spoke to man was to give him direction to give him guidance to show him how he is to operate in this world, to show him who is in charge.

There's a communion going on, there is a connection, and God is speaking words to Adam. Now, but what's interesting, when Adam speaks, we see he begins to name the animals. And then notice he begins when the wife comes, he says, whoa, man or woman. Okay. Either or. But the idea is, and then there is an implication of communicating with his wife.

But notice the pattern. God speaks. God speaks to man. He gives, again, man directives and direction. But by the way, this is for free. You didn't pay for this.

Think about this. Notice the two things that God gave Adam first. He gave him work and he gave him a warning. Notice when he got the woman. After the work and the warning. Here's what I tell my daughters.

If he ain't working and don't know the word, he ain't the one. Right? Because there's a pattern here. Are y'all catching on to where I'm going here? So that was for free. All right.

Let's just wake you up, make sure you're with me. All right. But notice here, here is God speaking, and God is giving direction. God is giving guidance. Then Adam begins to speak, and he is speaking and declaring as he is learning how to articulate. He is understanding the big picture of life, if you will, and he has gotten this information from God.

But in our notes, I want us to look at this, just a pattern. It says God spoke the world into existence. God created mankind and spoke to man revealing how he used to relate with God and operate in this world as a result man named the animals as a result man spoke to and about the woman revealing who she is and how she is to relate to him now this isn't in your notes but I want you to think about this notice if you go to the book of John chapter 1 it says the word became what flesh not that the flesh became word.

God could have easily just spoke from heaven to reveal himself but God chose to come down in the form of man The word became flesh The implication for you and I is that God never intended for communication to just be about words It was meant to connect Now I'm going to get personal for a moment. Do people feel connected when they talk to you or do they feel disconnected? I mean sometimes we can talk in a way that people can't really hear us because our attitudes are in the way.

Or sometimes we can talk in a way because we're not considering the people that we're talking to and they totally miss us. God intended for our words to be a means of connecting. How is your communication? How are you using the very gift that God has given of communication? Are people delighted? Are people depressed after they talk to you?

Are people encouraged or are they discouraged after two or three minutes of conversation? Are you the kind of person that nobody wants to talk to because you talk too much? Are you the kind of person that no one wants to talk to because you don't talk enough? In my biblical counseling assignments, my first day of class, I always challenge my students on this.

I say, okay, how many of you in this room love to talk? You know, everybody raises their hand. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I said, wonderful. Assignment number one this week, do not say anything to anyone about yourself unless they ask you. Only ask questions to get to know them.

I said, and you're going to discover how full of yourself you really are. And they give me that look like you guys are giving me now. Are you in my class? But they do. They give me that look, and my challenge to them is this. communication has to be more than just you revealing yourself it has to be about connecting with people to the glory of god especially in counseling the best counselors are the best listeners i remember going to this party with my wife one time and these ladies and these men had asked us to come out just want us to fellowship so this this guy got me in a corner i'm sitting there and he's just talking and i've learned enough about communication 101 what's the one thing that most people like to talk about themselves this guy got to going I never got a word and I just sat and listened and at the end of the conversation here's what he says I really enjoyed talking to you this was a great time and I thought I Oh, you did.

Don't let that be you guys. Communication was meant to connect us. Now, can I get an amen right now? All right, now you're tracking with me. I want you to walk with me a little bit. Let's look at point number three, because as we understand this, I need you to get a picture of our words, because in looking at effective communication, words are everything in the process.

And point number three is that communication is filled with words words expose who we are and where we are in life and so again let's jump on this bible bus and we're going to move into the new testament for a moment i want you to turn to luke chapter 6 luke chapter 6 verses 44 to verses 45 and as we explore this together the point I want you to see is that words reflect what's in our hearts words reflect what's in our hearts and Luke chapter 6 verse 44 notice what he says for each tree is known by its own fruit for men do not gather figs from thorns nor do they pick grapes from a briar brush the good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil for the mouth speaks from that which fills its heart your words reflect where you are you want to get to know who a person really is let them get real comfortable and start to talk and the more they express themselves the more you start to see where their hearts are. Because if you get honest, the more relaxed you are, the more you tell me who you are by the very words that you speak. And words show us something about the individuals.

And that's one of the things I like about being a pastor. I get to talk to people around the country and the more they talk, they just unfold for me issues of life that maybe they're not thinking about, other areas of life where they're doing well to the glory of God, but I get to see who they are. Have you thought about what you're showing people about you?

Grumbling complaining fussing cussing fighting You know those areas when you do that I sure you guys don do that here We talking about people that are not at this church okay A matter of fact turn to the person next to you and say he's not talking about me, he's talking about you, okay? But you get my picture? Our hearts are on display in the crunch times of life.

What comes out of you is really an understanding of where you are. but here's a second point I want you to understand about words and communication point number two words reflect the system of life by which we operate now this to me is a real telltale sign I want you to get on the bible bus with me again and let's jump to first john chapter four for a moment first john chapter four words reflect the system of life by which we operate here's a wonderful book of god in first john where here is i was about to say paul i'm so used to preaching on paul but not paul but john is trying to tell us something about knowing those who belong to christ and those who do not notice in first john chapter 4 verse 5 he says they are from the world therefore they speak as from the world and the world listens to them verse 6 we are from God he who knows God listens to us and he who is not from God does not listen to us by this we know the spirit of truth and the spirit of error the more you talk the more you reveal your belief system and as I evaluate your belief system I'm learning are you being guided by the truth of the word of God or you're being guided by the wisdom of this world. And the more you get to talk to people, you get a chance to really see, man, you say you love Jesus Christ. You say that he is the one that's delivered you from the penalty of sin, the power of sin, and one day the presence of sin.

You say that you have this normal loving relationship with him, but your words reveal the belief system that totally contradicts him. So which one is it? Is it really true that you love him or maybe you don't. But our words are exposing so much about us. Look at the next thing because you say, well, wait a minute. Can't you be deceptive with your words?

Boy, I can't get anything past you guys can I Which is the point I want to make right Third point words can also cover up what in our hearts revealing how deceptive we can be at times Now, it's interesting, let's go back to the Old Testament for a moment, because this verse is sometimes, I think, misunderstood and misquoted. And I want to give you an idea of what it's like. Turn to Proverbs again, back on the Bible bus, going backwards for a moment.

We want to look at Proverbs 23, verse 6 to verse 7. so many people start at verse 7 with this particular context but they don't really understand it because they don't go back and look with me at verse number 6 notice what it says proverbs 23 6 do not eat the bread of a selfish man or desire his delicacies verse 7 for as a man thinks within himself, so he is. He says to you, eat, drink, but his heart is not with you. What I want you to notice here, this verse is revealing deception, but it's helping us to see something.

Let's say you come to my house, okay? Now, by the way, I love chocolate chip cookies. Did I tell you I love chocolate chip cookies? Okay. By the way, did I mention my love for chocolate chip cookies? So what do you think I kind of like again?

Man, you guys are working. we're going to get good together. It's going to be great. Now, let's say you come to my house, and there is only one chocolate chip cookie left on the table, and I see you looking at it, okay? In my heart, I say, they better not ask me for that chocolate chip cookie. But I smile at you and say, go ahead. You're welcome to that cookie.

Now, my words are saying one thing, but what is my heart saying? What's in me is who I really am, not what I said to you. That's the context of this passage. And there are times when people are very deceptive where they're saying one thing with that holy fake smile, you know, not the real genuine love, but that, hey, we love you, brother. I can't stand you.

We love you, you know. And they've got that one thing going, but what's in their hearts is revealing who they are. And sometimes our words can be deceptive that way. Sometimes it's not revealing who we are. It is trying to hide who we are. But words are powerful. it helps us to understand the nature of where we stand look with me at one more point and we're still around the book of proverbs so let let dive in just for a moment words can reflect how righteous or wicked we are in life words can reflect how righteous or wicked we are in life Look with me at Proverbs 15 verse number 2 He says in Proverbs 15 2 the tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable but the mouth of fools spout folly.

How wise are you? how foolish are you when people hear you talk do they go now there's a wise person or do they say you know what this person is clueless but your words are telling me about who you are i want to read this to you i found this to be interesting i i thought man does this not reflect many people in life now watch this i'm going to read this to you It's fascinating. It's called He Said, She Said. Another marriage is shattered, Lord.

The divorce will be final next week. He said it was the breakdown of communication and a subtle infiltration of boredom. She said it was an accumulation of things. He said she was unnecessarily preoccupied with the home children activities. She said he stifled her dreams and ignored her achievements. he said he felt he was in prison restricted that night after night he never really got a chance to do whatever that was right in his own eyes or what he thought was a good thing she said he was harsh and brutal and often embarrassed her in public he said she was critical in her attitude and contributed to his sense of inadequacy she said he felt lonely and unappreciated with no calm claim to personal identity he said she wallowed in self-pity and refused to acknowledge her benefits she said he was shiftless and irresponsible he said she didn't care she said he didn't care lord how tragic that through all of the wasted years neither one of them asked what do you say too often in life we're not using god's communication as god intended and it's being revealed in the constant bickering and battering my challenge to you is to ask the question what does god say about your communication where do you stand I want you to look with me for a moment as we travel on this Bible bus and we're coming to a close.

Now be careful when a black preacher tells you that, that means there's 30 more minutes, okay? I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Just try to see if you're awake. All right, you're good. Number four, words impact our lives. Words impact our lives.

For the sake of time, I won't run through all the scriptures, but I want you to think about this. the condition of your relationships with others are impacted by the words you're speaking or the words you're not speaking. Now, think about this. How many of you in here are married? Let me just see a sign of hands. Now, do you realize that you were married by means of communication?

Had there been no communication, could you have gotten married? Communication is what brought you together. Now, unless you're telling me there was something unique about your situation where you never talked, you just kind of understood each other, and bam, you got married. I want to hear about it because we need to write about it. But no one in this room can say we got married and we never talked.

All of your connecting was due to your communication. Now, if I were to talk about how things are good or great in the marriage, I'm not going to go there, but just for the sake if I were to ask how things are going, each one of you will give me your perspective and each one of you as we get to talking about it more you'll begin to see that the way of communication uh-oh almost lost something that would have been good wouldn't it for it to fall we got your attention if you were asleep but it would you know anyway i digress the way you communicate is determining the condition of the marriage are your words being delightful or your words being hurtful? Let me give you some examples of what I mean here.

Look with me at letter A. Words can bring healing or hurt to a situation. You guys remember this passage, life and death is in the power of the tongue? Now, a whole lot of charismatic folk have gotten a hold of that and they have taken it to a level that was never intended to be. If you study the Hebrew passage, of life and death in the context is talking about ruin or refreshing and so the idea is that your tongue has the ability to bring ruin to the day or your tongue has the ability to bring refreshment to the day And so by your tongue in the relationship you can bring things that can be encouraging or you can bring things that are discouraging.

How are your words, guys? If I were to talk to people closest to you, not people in church because, you know, we all look like Jesus in the church, right? every sunday morning we we look like you even smell like jesus on sunday morning right but but monday through saturday sometimes it's a different story i i kid my my daughters you know they were in school one time and she said daddy i learned my my oldest i learned this term today called atheism i said wonderful i said what's an atheist honey she said well you know from what my teachers are telling me an atheist is a person who basically doesn't believe that god exists i said wonderful i said i've got a new term for you she said what's that i said what's a practical atheist practically she said yeah i said a practical atheist are christians monday through saturday she said what do you mean daddy i said well we believe that god exists but sometimes we live and act as if he doesn't from Monday to Saturday. Just like I've been watching you over the last week and need to talk with you.

Guys, let's make sure that we're not practical atheists. Let's make sure that our words are reflection of the very glory of God. Are you with me? See, that should be an amen moment right there. That's when you go, all right so you're working you're getting the picture so here's the point words bring healing or hurt to a situation secondly words can stir up fights and quarrels in a situation now i don't know about you but many times in my marriage i was one sentence away from a good night oh some of you know just what i mean one sentence away from a good night here's what happened i just said one more thing and if i'd I just kept my mouth shut for 30 seconds and not said that one thing, we would not have been in that Lionel Richie moment all night long.

Okay? You ever had that happen? Where if you, it's just one sentence, if you had just kept your mouth shut, the night would have been wonderful. But because you said that one extra thing it stirred up all kinds of trouble Words can do that guys It can put us in a position if we not careful if we not guarding our hearts if we not thinking about the glory of God and the benefit of others and just ourselves, we begin to just pour things out that can create all kinds of stuff.

Here's the third thing. Words can bring what is proper or words can bring what is perverted to our lives you ever thought about that what you talk about what that stirs up as you keep hearing it and you keep going through it this is crucial for you and i because if we want to get to a biblical way of communicating and evaluating we got to really look at what we're saying here's the next thing i want you to see words can lead us into trouble or help us escape from trouble. True story.

There was this couple, they went to France and they brought their poodle with them to France. And so they couldn't speak the language well. And since they couldn't speak the language well, they kept trying to work through. And so they got to this dinner and they had their poodle with them and they were trying to tell the guy, I want you to bring food for our dog.

So they were pointing at the dog saying, food, food, food for the dog, food for the dog. So they grabbed the dog, took it to the back, and when they came out, they had the dog on the platter. Pretty scary, huh? Now, I say that to get your attention for one reason. Do you know how many people we kill a day because of our miscommunication? Do you know how many people have been burned because we didn't think before we speak?

Do you know how many people are struggling now with us and we're struggling with them because we're not considering God's glory and taking the time to learn communication? Guys, this is a serious matter for the church and we've got to get to a place where we're truly honoring God with our communication. so let me close out by saying this to you with all this being said today we've got to develop in God honoring communication and all of God's children said all right you're catching it man I think I'm gonna stick around here Tim they're good man I don care what you say about them they really are good I kidding he hadn said anything I kidding Some might go what Just joking guys So here are four things I want you to think about Notice that famous verse there Psalm 19 let the meditation of my... How many of you know that verse?

Anybody know that, Psalm 19? You want to stand up and say it for everybody? She's like, oh, did he just do that? I saw you put your hand up. Let the words of my and the meditation of my be acceptable to whom? My, my, my.

Our words must be acceptable to God. If we're going to develop in God-honoring communication, our words must first be acceptable to God. Here's the second thing I want you to notice. Our words must be edifying to others and bring grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4.29 John says, let no unwholesome word proceed from where, but only such as good for edification according to the need of the moment.

Whose need, by the way? Not yours, but the other person. That it may give grace to those who hear. So our words must be edifying. Thirdly, our words must feed people truth and wisdom, not foolishness and mess. we've got to look at that one and we just can't let that one slide let's go to proverbs chapter 10 for just a moment this is a powerful powerful premise for me proverbs chapter 10 let's look at verse 18 proverbs chapter 10 verse 18 he says he who conceals hatred has lying lips and he who spreads slander is a fool when there are many words transgression is unavoidable but he who restrains his lips is wise.

The tongue of the righteous is his choice silver. The heart of the wicked is worth little. The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of understanding. Our words must be a blessing to others. God wants to use us to provide wisdom, not foolishness to people. And then finally, we will spend the rest of our time together over the few days working through letter D we must be quick to what slow to and then slow to We will spend the rest of the time trying to understand in order to develop effective communication, how do we apply that in real time?

Because guys, it's my contention, it's my belief that God has called us to be the kind of people that even in our words we show the very excellence of God. And I'm not necessarily talking about correct English, I'm talking about a heart that is right with God that seeks to articulate love to others. Because I know some preachers with bad English but with great hearts.

And I get exactly what they're saying. And I know some preachers that have wonderful speech but I wouldn't want to spend a minute with them privately. Because their hearts don't match their message. My prayer for you guys today is that you think about what we're saying. go back, read these passages come together and let's reason through God word over the next few days and let look at where you are let distinguish between gossip and sharing let distinguish between what do I do when Al talks to Betty about Carl let let's talk about how God wants me to learn how to listen and and then when I do open my mouth how I should articulate the glory of God in what I say and let's walk away this week encouraged and challenged that you and I together will begin to speak the words of life that people may see who we are to his glory and their transformation.

All of God's children said, let's pray together. Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, we thank you. You are so kind. You're so loving. You've given us everything we need for life and godliness. And so, Lord, I pray that as you've given us everything we need, Lord, may we embrace it.

May we not excuse ourselves, but make confessions unto you, knowing that you're faithful and just to cleanse us of all unrighteousness. And Lord, help us to learn what you say, live what you say, and then, Lord, love others through what we're living and learning. And we'll be careful to give you the glory. In Jesus' name, amen.