Partners In Paradise

Let's pray. God our Father, as we come now to the text of Scripture, we pray that Your Spirit would teach us and teach us what this is about. It's too easy, Lord, to use our favorite passages to prove what we want. Instead, Lord, help us now to understand the purpose for which You gave it. Work in our hearts. help us to be conformed to the Lord Jesus as a result of our hearing of your word and we'll thank you in Jesus name.

Amen. Think about this for a moment. Everything is motivated in some way by desire to create paradise. everything that you do is motivated in some way by a desire to create paradise i mean does it not seem to you that that your personal agendas and decisions are motivated by the desire to create the best world or the best life or the good life one of the most common ideas well at least one of most common ideas is that doing whatever you want, whenever you want, wherever you want, is paradise, right?

That's the good life. Unhindered by anything else. The single life, that's the life. Unhampered by any kind of responsibility to another person. How often do we hear jokes and comedy routines that degrade marriage? Have you ever used the term ball and chain when referring to your spouse.

Well, in these opening chapters of Genesis, God makes it clear that marriage is part of what makes up paradise. Now, let's get our bearings where we are here in this book. You remember, as we noted last week, that chapter 2, verse 4, through chapter 4, verse 26, is the first Toledo. Now, for those of you have been with us. Toledot is the Hebrew term for generations, and there are 10 sections of this book organized around that term These are the generations of all right And so there are 10 of those books if you will that make up Genesis We in the first Toledot that goes from chapter 2 verse 4 to chapter 4 verse 26 And this first Toledot is comprised of three acts.

The first act, Paradise Created. Act 2, The Curse Imposed. Act 3, Corruption Spreads. Now, in this chapter that we're going to finish today, chapter 2, God intends to tell us exactly what we lost when we forfeited paradise by sin. Now, last week we saw this. We saw God's provision for paradise, the special creation of its occupant, man, the garden in which man would experience the presence of God, the blessings of God for discovery, learning, and creating. than we saw God's purpose for man in paradise.

It was to be a life of work, a life of faith, a life of obedience, and a life of dependence that is depending on the revelation of God for all understanding. And now we come to the last element we need for our understanding of paradise, and that is partners in paradise. You follow along as I read Genesis 2, verses 18 through 25. We've heard it already once this morning.

Let's hear it again. Then the Lord God said, It is not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper fit for him. Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name.

The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man. And while he slept, took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.

Then the man said, this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man. Therefore, the man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed Paradise the good life included this element the partnership of man and woman in marriage Let look at this text together God reveals to you first of all God reveals to you the need for marriage, verses 18 through 23.

Now as this narrative starts out, God pronounces within the trinities, talking within the trinity at this point, that it's not good for man to be alone. And so it's necessary for him to make a helper that's fit. Now why does God make that pronouncement? Why does he say it's not good for man to be alone? We have some clues here. Remember in chapter 1, verses 26 and 27, as we get the great big picture before God narrows the focus to man. in chapter 1 verses 26 and 27 it says then God said let us make man in our image after our likeness and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth so God created man in his own image and the image of God he created him male and female he created them.

Notice he says, let's make man in our image after our likeness and let what? Them have dominion. And then when he talks about creating man in the image of God, he talks about not just creating a man, but creating male and female. And so we noted that a full expression of the image of God is the differences in our gender. Because the image of God was not yet fully represented.

It was not good that man be alone. This two in oneness reflects the triunity of God. And as well, man could not fulfill his purpose, his God-given purpose alone. The idea of a helper communicates that just as God fulfills his purpose as three in one, so man fulfills his God-given responsibility as two in one. He couldn't fulfill it. In fact, God says we need to make, God says I need to make a helper that is fit for him.

A fit helper. That word fit means compliment. The idea of a perfect compliment. The key fits in the lock right There this idea of complementarianism here that there is a compliment to the man that is not like him but fits Okay A fit helper. But you know, the man doesn't know that yet. And so God demonstrates his need.

Now, when I was younger, this was one of the most puzzling passages of Scripture for me. When I was younger, I couldn't figure out what's this marching of all these animals to Adam. I mean, what is that all about? Because God is demonstrating his need to the man. So he caused all the animals to come to the man. And the man names all the animals.

Now again, what did we note before? We noted before that in the beginning of the creation account, God names everything, right? And God called this day. Let this happen and God called it that. That's a sign of sovereignty. That's a sign of rulership, of authority.

And so when man names the animals, what's happening here? He again is expressing the image of God in naming his sovereignty over the beast, his dominion over the beast is shown by the fact that he names them. It also demonstrates man's ability to learn and discover. You see, more than just naming the beast, he's not just going, ah, I think I'll call that dog Tiger, Robin.

It means more than that. He has the idea of discerning their nature and expressing it in their names. Now, let me try this on you. And you're all going to be afraid to respond to me, so let's see what happens. When I use the word Felix domesticus, do you know what I'm talking about? Felix domesticus.

Ah, a cat. What kind of a cat? A domesticated cat. Very good, class. That's exactly what it means. Well, that's kind of what Adam was doing.

See, when you use that kind of terminology, you're expressing something about the nature of that being. This is a cat that's domesticated. Well, that's what Adam was doing. This is the first example of scientific naming, if you will. And he named them according to their nature. But he not only discovers something about the animals, he discovers something about the animals. about himself in these zoological studies.

But for Adam, there was not found a helper fit for him. Now that puzzled me. It's like, well, God's not looking. What's going on? For Adam, there was not a helper found. God already knew that.

Who found? What does this mean? Who was looking? Well, Adam was. Adam found. Adam could not find a being, no creature corresponding to himself.

Nothing of his nature. Nothing made of the same stuff as Adam. You know, sometimes, you know, I'm going to give you a quote here. And it comes from a book written for children. But sometimes those guys can figure out what Scripture means better than some of us and all our sophisticated exegesis, all right? This is a quote from a book called Long Story Short. short.

None of them could talk or sing or worship God like Adam could. You get it? It's not that he just saw, he's not just saying, hey, there's nobody like me. It's just like there was nothing that corresponded to him at all. None of these other creatures could sing or talk or worship God like he could. He saw that there was something missing.

He may be the monarch of all he views, but he's alone. Well, then God creates the perfect companion for him. Verses 21 through 23. God causes a deep sleep to fall upon the man. He removes the rib and he creates a woman from that rib. And then he presents the woman to the man and Adam joyfully cries, this at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.

To paraphrase it, wow, is what he says. Okay? Now he sees that she's of the same stuff, the same nature as Adam, yet she is a wholly new creature. In some ways, so much alike. In other ways, so much different. Okay?

And that shows up in the name that he gives her notice. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man She shall be called Isha because she was taken from Ish The Hebrew word for man is Esh The Hebrew man for woman is Esha Okay? Now you can even see it in our own language. Look at the verse there. I'm sure you've noticed, right? Do you see how woman and man resemble each other?

They both got the word man in them. Do you see that? I hope you have. just in case you have it I'll bring it up now alright that reflects that the same and yet different now this should tell us something about the way God wants us to see life alright the first thing is this and it seems obvious to us but the world around us blind and wandering in the darkness just doesn't get it marriage is between a man and a woman I'm not trying to score any political points here.

I'm not making a political statement. I'm simply saying what God reveals here. Marriage is a man and a woman. And it doesn't matter how you redefine it. It's not marriage without a man and a woman in a covenant relationship. It's not marriage.

You can define it all you want. It's like Abraham Lincoln once said this. if you named a dog's tail a leg, how many legs would he have? Typically, everyone says, well, he'd have five legs. He says, no, he'd only have four. It doesn't matter what you call the tail. It's not a leg.

All right? You can call it marriage all you want. If it's not between a man and a woman, it's not marriage. God says that, God reveals that marriage is between a man and a woman. Second, we ought to celebrate our gender differences. It's clear from the Genesis account that men don't have anything above women in terms of equality before God, in terms of being made in the image of God.

Men don't have anything on women on that front. And we ought to celebrate our differences. We live in a world now that's trying to tell us something different. You know what's taught in most universities today? Here's what's being taught today. That gender is a social construct not a biological one You know what that means That means society tells you whether you a man or a woman not biology You may be a man in a woman's body, or vice versa.

That's what it's telling us. In fact, someone mentioned at the FIRE conference at one of the universities there, they're saying there's 14 different genders. what I know we laugh but again be reminded what the scripture says that man in his wisdom is blind is in the dark not to put down those gender differences we have to celebrate them now do you see what else makes this woman a perfect companion a contributor to paradise Here it is. She's a helper.

She is a helper. God says, I will make a helper that's fit. A fit helper. A helper that compliments. That perfectly answers what a man is. Now, when the Bible uses the word helper here, He created, I will make him a helper fit for him.

And in verse 20, the man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam, there was not found a helper fit for him. You know what we do? We tend to take that word helper and demean it. Unless you're the top dog, unless you're the leader, then something's wrong. A helper is second rate.

Now, that's not us saying this. That's what the world often says. But it can't possibly be a demeaning term. Here's why. That word helper, of the 19 times it's used in the Old Testament, 16 of those times it's used of God. 16 times it's used, 16 of the 19 times that word is used of God.

Exodus 18.4 And the name of the other is Eliezer. for he said the God of my father was my help and delivered me from the sword of Pharaoh Eli Ezer Eli is Hebrew for my God Ezer is help My God is my help Deuteronomy 33, verse 7. And this He said of Judah, Hear, O Lord, the voice of Judah, and bring Him into His people. With your hands contend for Him, and be a help against his adversaries.

What is he saying? He's saying, help Judah. Without your help, he will not make it. Without your help, Judah won't make it. Psalm 20, verses 1 and 2. May the Lord answer you in the day of trouble.

May the name of the God of Jacob protect you. may He send you help from the sanctuary and give you support from Zion. How many would say help there is a demeaning way of using that word? Oh God, He's only a help. What's He saying there? God, without your help, we're lost. And of course, the most familiar one to us, Psalm 46, verse 1.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Now, calling a woman a helper suggests something rather important. Helper does not signify inadequacy. Instead, it signifies essential contribution. Essential contribution. Alright?

It's not demeaning to be called a helper. the man was created in such a way that he could not fulfill the purpose God had given him without a partner now many describe paradise today remember we all make our decisions based on some form of what we think paradise ought to be what the good life is what the best life is right and many people today want to create a paradise by saying I got to have the top spot I've got to occupy the top spot. I have to have the ability and authority to do what he does, or I'm useless. That's not what the Bible says.

To be a helper is to bring something that's essential, and that without that help, man could not fulfill the role he was in. or fulfill the responsibilities that God had given him. Now again, I want you to notice, Adam names the woman. What should that tell you? That he is the leader in this relationship. Because naming signifies what? Authority.

Naming signifies authority. And so, before sin ever entered the picture, even in perfection, even in paradise, the man was the leader. Again, that's not to denigrate helper. It's just to say that even before sin entered, man occupied a place of authority. So consider then what paradise means. It means this.

Relationship. Man was created as a relational being, reflecting the nature of the Trinity. God is a relational being, is he not? Three persons in one relating to one another. Man is created as a relational being with man and woman. Paradise means mutual assistance.

Even before the advent of sin, man could only fulfill his purpose with the help of a woman. There's mutual assistance. Again, in our culture, in our world, we say, what? Paradise means I do it by myself, rugged individual. I don't need anybody. That's not how God created us.

The good life, the paradise, is what? A life of mutual assistance, not a life of rugged individualism. And then it also means that there are roles. Even before the advent of sin, men and women have particular roles to fulfill without a hint of inferiority or superiority. There's not a hint of that here. So God reveals here the necessity of marriage in paradise.

Necessity of partnership in life. that's what God expects now in verses 24 and 25 God reveals to you the nature of marriage do you see anything unusual about verse 24 Let read it Therefore man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. Do you see anything unusual about verse 24?

I ask people this all the time and they don't see it, but this verse caused me incredible confusion as a kid. You say, Tim, that's the nature of you, not that verse. Well, be that as it may. It always confused me as a kid. Here's why. Adam doesn't have any parents.

Does he? Who are Adam's parents? He doesn't have any. Why in the world is this saying then, therefore man shall leave his mother and father, hold fast to his wife, and they will become one flesh? I don't get it. Lord, what is this verse all about?

He doesn't have a mother and father. Here's what it's all about. In this verse, the narrator, Moses, breaks in with the moral of the story. Verse 24 and 25, he's telling, here's why I've told you this. In other words, Moses is applying this text to you. He's applying it to you.

He's saying to us, hey, this isn't just history. This is meant for you. I've told you this story. I've narrated this whole thing in order to tell you what marriage is all about. Wow. Okay.

I guess we better listen really close then, huh? It's not just a history lesson. This chapter was not given so we could go out. And its purpose was not to go out and fight all those political battles about what marriage is. Although it addresses that. It wasn't given for that purpose.

It was given so you and me would know what marriage is all about. So I guess we better listen. For this reason, marriage helps you fulfill your God-given purpose. For this reason. What reason? Fulfilling your God-given purpose.

Marriage helps you fulfill your God-given purpose. Man cannot fulfill his mandate to serve God and rule creation alone It was never intended that way Everything being equal you can best serve God when you enter into marriage Now let me say this very quickly. Footnote, footnote, alright? With the coming of sin, things change. So that when Jesus comes, he says, some people can better serve the kingdom in a celibate state.

Paul says the same thing in 1 Corinthians 7. It's better than a man not be married. If he's not married, he can devote more of his time to the things of God. All right? But nevertheless, for most of us, and Paul goes on to say that is a special gift. Not many have it.

So that is to say then, all things being equal, all right? Normally speaking, you fulfill your purpose that God has given you in the covenant relationship of marriage. So marriage helps you fulfill your God-given purpose. Your marriage will be what God intended if you pursue companionship. Do you want a paradise today in your marriage? Who doesn't, right?

Who doesn't want that? Well, if you want what God always intended marriage to be, right? the marriage as you see it before sin if you want what God intends your marriage to be then you have to leave cleave and weave ok leave your father and mother cleave to your wife and weave yourself into a one flesh relationship first of all he says what you must leave your mother and father the word means forsake which is to say your relationship with your parents must change radically. Alright?

It must change radically. Leave. Put it this way. Establish an adult relationship with them. You're not under their authority anymore. Neither you or your wife are not under their authority.

You have to be more concerned about your mate's ideas than your parents. Okay? One of the things my dad taught me years and years ago he says Tim when you get married don ever don ever say this That not the way my mom did it Don ever do that All right You know, I've told this story so many times. I've been to so many different places. I don't know if I've told it here.

So let me take a chance. I'm sure my children will signal me going, oh, Dad, we've heard it a thousand times before. I can remember when I was at my last year at Cedarville it was my last quarter there, Becca was already at home we were engaged, we were going to get married that summer it was spring, I was in the school musical and I said hey why don't you come out why don't you come out and see the musical her response was no my dad says that that's going to be, that's kind of a waste of money so because gas prices had gone up to like 50 cents a gallon.

So I said, okay, fine. And I remember thinking, kid night, when is this girl going to ever cut her apron strings to her parents? This is just ridiculous. Why can't she do anything on her own? And then later that spring, I think it was after graduation, we were at our house. And she came walking out of the kitchen, and she said this, I think your mother uses too much water when she cooks her potatoes.

I was furious. I was really mad. How could she say anything like that? All right? Well, here's the point. The point is, when you get married, your mate's ideas and counsel becomes more important than your parents.

Okay? It means you make the husband-wife relationship your priority relationship. All right? Leave your parents. Now he goes on to say, hold fast to her. Cleave to her.

Be united to her. To cling or to hold fast. He has the idea of loyalty. Priority of affection. Priority of affection. Cling to her.

Here's a scene that too often plays out. All right? And this is where a lot of marriage counseling happens. at this point. Here's a scene that too often plays out. Monday. Hi, dear, I'm home.

Gotta go. You know the softball team plays tonight. Tuesday. Who's taking the kids to practice tonight? Wednesday. Hi, hon, how are you?

No, did you forget that Sam and I are working on the car tonight? Thursday. Hey, hon, I'm home tonight. What? I didn't know you and Jen were doing that tonight. Okay, fine, see you later.

Friday. What a day. What a lousy day, but I got good news. The boss says, I'm going to get promoted, I'm getting this other job. Now, it means I'm going to be gone four days out of the week, but the money's going to be really good. What's the problem here?

Right? There's no clinging to. There's no holding fast to. What else has priority of affection for you? Does your spouse have priority of affection or something else? Too many Christians invest enormous amounts of time in work, in hobbies, in education, in sports, and even children rather than companionship.

I remember when I learned this it changed the way we did things in our family it changed radically the way we did things in our family I still remember this we said wow if that's true then we have to really work at being companions it meant the kids are in bed by 8 o'clock every night so we have at least 2 to 3 hours by ourselves to be companions. We destroyed our boys' NBA careers. You know?

You remember how it used to be the 4th, 5th, 6th grade in our county basketball? The 4th grade LaRue guys would be playing here, but the 5th grade LaRue boys may be playing across the county. And we said, hey, we can't do that. We're not going to do that. So we're going to flip a coin. Whoever wins the coin toss gets to choose whether he wants to play this year or next.

Okay? Only one of you is going to play because we're not going to be running all over the world to do this. They wrestled instead, which is better, I think. But, you know, it meant early on here saying no to outside ministries. You say, what? You mean you said no to serving God?

No. I said no to serving God outside, but serving God with my wife. You know what it means? Sometimes you just got to say no You got to be companions That what God tells us here And then he says they shall become one flesh The weaving. This speaks of oneness or intimacy. Now, this is not merely referring to sexual relationship in marriage.

That's not what it's saying. And one of the reasons why I say that is because of what we heard even today from the Gospel of Mark. Remember what Jesus said? Haven't you read? For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one.

Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate. In other words, he's talking something more than sex here. He's talking about you weave your life together so that you're like one. You're like one. Okay? Sexual intimacy is nothing more, well, nothing less, than the expression of the oneness that you already have.

And this is a whole other sermon, but I'll just put it out this way. It's the icing on the cake. Okay? Now, some of you who've lost a spouse here this morning know what I'm talking about. Right? You know what I mean.

When that spouse of yours went to be with the Lord, it was like half of you was gone. It's like someone took a cleaver and just... Because you had become, over all those years, you had become one. That's what God is talking about here. You see? God intends for two people to become like one.

Like the Trinity. Two, but one. You see? The bottom line is companionship. Now, verse 25. Marriage should display the perfect harmony that God intended for us.

While verse 24 used to confuse me, verse 25 as a kid always made me giggle. ooh they're talking about naked people right you know how that is a lot of you kids here your kids sitting with you right now that's what they're doing they going ooh they talking about nakedness in the bible what in the world is that all about What this all about people being naked and having no shame Simply this and I think God is saying something significant here The original couple was so close that nothing came between them, not even close. They were so close that nothing came between them. There was no distrust, there was no greed, there was no dishonor, There was no suspicion.

Nothing was hidden. It was a perfect relationship. Perfect ease existed with this couple. They were so one that nothing came between them. There was perfect ease in their roles. The woman did not think that the man would use his position of leadership to take advantage of her.

And he, on his part, could not imagine her undermining or working against him. It wasn't even part of their consciousness. There was perfect vulnerability. Whatever she might say or do, it would never occur to him to use that to humiliate her in front of anybody else. Imagine that, huh? perfect honesty he could count on the fact that she would never hide anything from him you see there's this perfect harmony how absolutely strange that seems to us with marriages plagued with suspicion and distrust and attributing motives isn't that right you know Thursday Thursday I got up before breakfast and said, I've got to get the septic tank uncovered.

I hate that. So I got my shovel out, went in the backyard, started digging away to uncover the lid of our septic tank. So I'm digging away and digging and digging and digging and I get the call for breakfast. I go in to eat breakfast. Sitting at the table, eating my eggs and my wife says to me, would you plunge the sink, please? That really upset me.

I sitting there thinking good night I out there digging this gigantic hole because that what you want And now you want me to plunge the sink you know and I attributing ulterior motives to her as if you know oh, she doesn't appreciate just how good of a husband she's got, you know, that kind of stuff. All right? But do you see the point I'm making? That all happens with you too, not just me.

Alright? So, what happened? I mean, there was none of that in this first marriage. None of that was there. Perfect harmony. No distrust.

No attributing ulterior motives. Right? Right? That's the way it was. That's the way God wants our marriages to be. That kind of harmony. now we're not going to get the complete picture unless we understand this this reflects a heavenly marriage that is to say this reflects god's view of christ and his church you say wait a minute christ's church hasn't arrived yet that's just way that's way down the line in redemptive history no it's not the idea of christ and his church precedes human marriage.

This is the reflection of the greater reality. This did not, human marriage did not precede the marriage of Christ and the church. Our marriages reflect the greater reality that God already had in view. And that ought to give us hope. Because as I've sat here and talked about marriage this morning, most of you, if not all of you, at least all of you who are married know my marriage is not perfect because I'm not perfect and my spouse surely is not either but you know what because we are linked to the lamb by covenant we can have hope You can have great hope.

Because it says in Ephesians chapter 5 that Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her that He might what? sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word. Jesus is in the process of cleansing us daily. He died for us that we would be different. Here is the level of the love of Jesus. It's not this kind of romantic willy-nilly stuff that comes and goes.

It's a love that is so deep and an affection that is so determined that he said, I'm going to die for the purpose of cleansing my bride. All of us who are in the church are being cleansed by the word of Christ. And he died so that we would be different. That is the level of his love. We can't tell the whole story here without Jesus, can we? There's no hope for us in our marriages without Him.

We can't even come close to paradise in our marriages without Jesus. We must have a Savior. Now, paradise was lost long ago. and yet it still sets the agenda even in the most intimate of human relationships. By the grace of Jesus then, we have to pursue the kind of marriages that fulfill God purposes for us working together as man and wife to glorify God By the grace of Jesus, we must leave, cleave, and weave.

Because that's what the world needs to see. That's what the world needs to see. It needs to see a reflection of what Christ himself is accomplishing. Christ is cleansing his church so that in our marriages we will reflect what Jesus is doing in our lives let's pray Father thank you for your word help us Lord to realize that you've given us roles and that those roles do not involve inferiority or superiority but that as in paradise at the very beginning it is a relationship of mutual assistance so that we might glorify God in this dark world and Father help us to pursue companionship with one another to pursue it to leave and to cleave and to weave so that we reflect the relationship of Christ and His church.

Help us to that end, we pray. Help us to be dissatisfied until we are growing. Help us, we pray, for Your glory and our good. In Jesus' name, Amen.