More Than Just Friends

Those of you here last night were introduced to the Word of God in a way that was helpful and I thought was tremendously refreshing to me. And again, I was just thankful to be here. So I'm hoping that you who are here for the first time will find that same experience and that you will be encouraged by the ministry of the Word of God. again I always have fun with Peter because my cross cultural friend is just always amazing me with different things that I never knew and even last night it's like wow I didn't know that so but you know what he doesn't know a lot of stuff either it's amazing now you know I don't want to just tell stories on Peter but you guys will get a kick out of this.

Okay? I think you kind of do want to do that, actually. I do. I'm picking up a different vibe. So I will. I do and I will.

When Peter moved from New York to Kentucky, and this is one of the first things he ever told me, so it sticks in my mind. He says, I was living in Kentucky for six months before I figured out that a groundhog, not a groundhog. A bush hog. A bush hog. before I figured out that a bush hog was not an animal. So, we're laughing with you, brother. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right, Peter, come minister the word of God. There's just not a lot of bush hogs in New York, or New York City at least. And I go to, I mean, picture this. I go to someone's home and they say, wow, with all this, they had bought several acres of land and they said, you know, now I got all this land, I might actually just buy a bush hog. And I thought, yeah, I mean, with this amount of land you could buy any number of animals.

You have a lot of land. So he says, because he has a lot of land, I think I'll get a tool. And I thought, he said, because I have a lot of land, I think I'll get an animal. so he said yeah I got all this land I should probably get a bush hawk I'm like yeah you probably should go for yours man YOLO get the animal you want and then it was like six or eight months later when I was visiting someone else and they were renting a bush hog And they said, yeah, I've got to return that bush hog.

And they just pointed to it and I went... Like I remember, I just like looking at it and realizing, ah, it's a thing. It's a total thing. So yeah, there's stuff. Oh, yeah, all kidding aside, like, I am just a hillbilly from a cool place. Like, I'm totally surrounded by mice.

I'm totally identified with and comfortable with my surroundings and don't know much outside of that. So when I moved to Kentucky, there was lots to be learned. And one of the things was that a bush hog, not an animal. Okay, so maybe you could help me. LaRue, LaRue. LaRue?

Yeah, I thought I could start a fight. This is fun. If you're native-born, it's LaRue. Would you agree with that statement? Raise your hand if you agree with that statement. Oh.

What's that? If you're native-born, you're right. Okay. So just real fast, raise your hand, it's LaRue. Wow. Raise your hand, it's LaRue.

I mean, that's almost a 50-50 split. That's really funny. All right, I'll switch back and forth. Yesterday, here's something. All right, here, one last story. One that I really will preach.

Yesterday, we were talking about the ministry that you had with the school that used to be across the street. And then we're sitting in Tim's house, which I think is an absolutely phenomenal and beautiful home. We keep talking about it. It's got so much character. Pasmus have so many memories there. And it's just in the, there's so much space.

I mean, even where I live in more of a suburban part of northern Kentucky, it's in a neighborhood. We love our home. But there's just, wow, there's so much space. And Tim goes, yeah, but now the school, the school moved way out into the country. And I thought he meant locally. And he meant, no, no, no, I don't know what you said, like eight miles out in the country.

I'm like, what is this? Like we step out and I guess because there was a road in front of us it not considered the country but I like this looks pretty country to me It pretty rural And I thinking what is he thinking of Like wow let drive eight miles after church today and see the country because this seems pretty country to me Well anyway it good to be back with you today. It was wonderful.

Thank you to those of you who put on the oatmeal bar, and that was really, really a great time of eating and enjoying each other's company. And I can now tell someone the first time I ever went to a bar before I preached was in LaRue, Ohio. On our way up, when we were driving yesterday, Jonathan asked my, Jonathan's my second oldest, he's back there, and he asked, he's giving everyone a wave, he asked, just kind of aloud in the car, either Sarah or I, he said, what are these, what are those, I forget how he worded it, those containers that he just saw as we were driving by.

They were silos. They were silos. Saw them all the way up, and Jonathan asked what they were, and I, of course, I was like, oh, that's a silo. And he's like, oh, what's in there? And I'm like, you know, I'm going to focus on the road and let your mother answer, because I, grain, hay, animals, people, bush hogs, I don't know what's in there. So, so, so she answered, and we were talking about, we were just talking about different things we were seeing on our way up.

It was really, really cool. And Jonathan asked what they were. And silos typically stand, at least in my limited observation from the seven I've seen in my lifetime, they stand alone, right? They stand alone. They're not necessarily connected to a building, but they're close to one, and they're used to store things, but they stand alone. And I bring this up just because I was thinking about the Word of God today before we get into it and what we're going to talk about as far as friendship is concerned.

Silos are good for what? Do any of you own a silo? Do you own a silo? So what are they good for? What's the function? Storing, right?

Is that universally true? Is there another function that they have? Or they are used for storing? Yeah, they're good for storing. Do you put things in the silo hoping that something's going to happen in there while it's in there and it comes out different? No?

It's a genuine question, people. Okay, right. So, yeah, hopefully not, right? You fill it up with what you want to keep in there, and then you pull it out when you want to use it. So change doesn't happen in a silo. Biblical change in our own lives does not happen in a silo And if we live lives that are separate from one another and we just live lives as silos and we store up all the information do all the things, take in all the good things that the Lord has for us, but just keep them in the silo of our life, that is not how long-lasting, fruitful change occurs in our life.

We do need each other. The lone ranger Christian is always in danger. And long-lasting, fruitful change doesn't happen with just you and God, like just you and your Bible and a flashlight. That's not how long-lasting, fruitful, biblical change takes place. Now, that's a powerful and provocative statement. It might even be a controversial statement, because in a sense, what I'm saying is that God and God alone is not enough to produce the change that he wants to have in you.

Or that the word of God, which I know this church holds very high, as do I, that the word of God, just you and your Bible, just you clutching your Bible and getting into the word, is actually not sufficient to bring about the whole change that the Lord has in store for people like you and me. And I'm kind of saying that, but I'm only saying that because of what I see God saying in his word, right? Because as you read through the Bible, you always notice the great heroes of the faith, the great heroes of the faith supported by friends around them.

Just a casual reading through Hebrews 11, which many people call the hall of faith, right? Going through how faith produced action in people's lives, how faith worked its wonderful, wonderful work by the grace of God in people's lives to bring about God's doing, God's ministry, you rarely see people in there who stand alone. Like when you think of Abraham, you think of Sarah, his loving wife and his good friend.

And although she made mistakes, who doesn't make mistakes? Just like Abraham made mistakes, Hebrews 11.11 raves about what? Her faith. Sarah stuck with her husband through thick and thin. Without her loving support, maybe Abe would have a much harder time following God's call. Moses, who I think there's going to be a long line in heaven with people who want to talk to Moses.

I'm going to be in that line. Okay? Moses is just, as I read through the Old Testament, he's just the man, person, as far as I'm Like, I'm really excited to meet Moses. And I know I'm going to be on my face worshiping the Lord. I get that. But every once in a while, I'm going to come up for Aaron.

I'm going to try to look for Moses. Moses' life can't be understood apart from the role of his relationships. He was not a silo, right? His brother Aaron spoke for him. Father-in-law Jethro taught him how to delegate so he wouldn't lose his mind. He had a sister Miriam who stood with him when the people rebelled.

And his friendships extended beyond his family. When everyone else doubted, Joshua and Caleb stood with Moses, right? Insisting that the children of Israel could conquer the land. Ruth and Naomi loyally served each other. Alone in a seductive world of palace life, Queen Esther stood firm in her faith because of her cousin Mordecai, a solid friend. David and Jonathan were soul brothers.

Elijah and Elisha were two prophets who were under attack but stuck together. Barnabas was a true friend to Paul, even when everyone else feared this former Christian hater and what I would argue to be a first century terrorist. Silas and Paul sang together in prison. Paul mentored Timothy. Timothy comforted Paul. Jesus himself had 12 close companions who lived, ate, slept, traveled with him.

When Jesus sent out his disciples to do ministry, did he send them out alone? No. He sent them out what? Two by two. The lone ranger Christian is not something that you find within the scriptures. It's just not in there.

These aren't just friends. Oh, they're just friends. Remember before we were saying yesterday that we tend to downplay friendship? Oh, we're just friends. These are major ministry partners. These are major means by which God works His growing and His sanctifying grace.

Biblical friendship is a necessity. It's a necessity. It's a powerful tool in our sanctification process of becoming more like Jesus and less like ourselves. The question for us to consider today is do you see that? Yesterday we spoke about the importance and the significance of being called a friend of Jesus When Jesus said you know greater love is no more than this then he laid down his life for his friends I no longer call you servants but I call you friends that that was what An upgrade right It wasn like I not calling you servants I just calling you friends now It's kind of a lateral move, but I figured I'd let you know.

It was an upgrade as far as what they were being called. They weren't being called just servants. They were privy to what Jesus was going to do. This was a big deal. Friendship is a big deal. Well, today we're going to focus, we're not going to not focus vertically, but we're going to look more horizontally at the importance of having biblical friendship in our lives.

And not just so that we can be happy together and hold hands and skip through the grass. That's fun. But that's not the reason why we want biblical friendship at work in our lives. I'd like to make the case that we need it, and if we don't have it, and if we don't pursue it, and I would say this, even if we don't pursue it even before we feel like pursuing it, we're probably missing out. and it's not just that we're missing out on something that could be nice and could be good and we could all feel warmer and more fuzzy together we're missing out on a major growth tool that the lord has in store for us and major sanctification that can take place in our lives because there are some things that the lord wants to accomplish in your life that i would go so far as to say that he's not going to accomplish with us just sitting in rows.

This serves a purpose. It serves a great purpose. I'm a preacher. Love preaching. Glad that the people would come to hear the word of God. This isn't it.

This is a main part of what we do as Christians, but this is not it. And as we look at the relationships that people throughout the word of God had, let's flip it on its head. Does the Bible show us examples of people who decided to go it alone? Like before, I listed a bunch of people about how their relationships were really helping them to grow and to change and to serve.

I wonder if there's other examples throughout the Word of God of people who decided that friends didn't really matter or the type of friends they had didn't matter and they just perhaps chose the wrong ones. You know, God sent the prophet Samuel to teach King Saul how to lead well, but Saul what? Refused to listen. As a result, his life ended tragically.

David's downfall was related to the lack of wise counsel from his military general and personal friend Joab When David sent orders to set up Uriah death in battle Joab obliged Rather than warning the king against being an accessory to murder Joab stayed silent Bad companion. Samson had a lot of potential. A lot of potential. Handsome, strong, chosen by God from birth, with the spirit of God resting on him. he made foolish, self-destructive choices and in every bitter moment he found himself siloed with the enemy he was facing.

Alone with the enemy. Friendship is a big deal in the Bible. With major consequences for better or for worse depending on whether or not people understand the need for friends in their lives and the need for fellowship. Now, turning your Bibles, if you would, to the book of Acts chapter 2 while I tell you a little story about last night at the Pasmo Hall.

Let me just quickly add, this is a real question, it's not rhetorical, please respond. Is there a dish you're known for? Is there a dish you're known for? Do you know that in this church, oh yeah, there's a dish that this person, if you want apple pie, this person makes it. If you want mac and cheese, this person makes it. Is there a dish you're known for?

You can brag on yourself. I ask. It's cool. It's not bragging. Just answer. Tell me a dish you're known for.

And if you don't, somebody else point out somebody else tell me a dish they're known for. Help a brother out. Wait, who's this? You're known for what? Pie and macaroni and cheese. Just pie in general?

Any pie. You said cheese. Makes cheesecakes. Okay. I'm seeing a dessert theme. Wow.

Really? Mrs. Fields, Cheesy Corn Bake is over there. Cheesy Corn Bake? I want to go to there Can they talk to the family Really That the reason why I come to go to there Really Yeah exactly I know It's not that the oatmeal wasn't awesome, it was really good, but wow guys. This is pretty impressive.

Any others? Say again? Wassil. Is that like spiced cider? That's pretty cool. Beck, what's that?

Beck has roast and emmison and cinnamon rolls. Wow. This is pretty impressive. Is LaRue known for anything? LaRue? Blood.

Blood. But it's not known for a meal or a food? Is Skyline up here? Skyline chili? Cooney's has a snake catcher today party every year. They're parading at 3 o'clock today because he got eyes to hell.

Gotcha. So certain people in certain places are known for certain meals. Cincinnati has a Cincinnati style chili, perhaps you're aware. It's actually, there's cocoa in it. It's very good. It's different from any other.

I like it, but it's like a thing in and of itself. But I like it, and we like cheese coneys, and we have them at Skyline, and we enjoy that. Last night we had pizza at the Pazmas. It was very good. It was pepperoni and where is it from? JC's Pizza.

JC's Pizza. So it was very good. We really, really enjoyed it. New York is kind of known for pizza. Chicago's known for pizza. It's one of our things.

And there's just certain things that are specific to certain towns. And if you went to, apparently if you live in LaRue, I really am trying to flip back and forth. If you live in LaRue and you want pizza, JC's would be the place to go. Are there a lot of pizza places in LaRue? Okay, so by virtue of it's the place, you would go to JC's and it's fine and it was very, very, very good.

If you said I'm going to New York City tomorrow and I'm going to be spending some time particularly in Midtown and we want to get pizza. Where would I tell them to go? Somebody tell me. Where would I... John's, that's right. So there's a place called John's Pizzeria.

44th and 8th, best brick oven pizza in the city. You'll show up, you'll put your name on a list, you'll be told there's an hour wait, you'll walk around Times Square for about 35 minutes, you'll come back, you'll check in, and you'll probably get in about 45 minutes. And you'll have phenomenal brick oven pizza. It's called John's Pizzeria. It's very, very, very good.

And it's just second to none throughout the city. There's another location downtown. For some reason, that location only takes cash. I don't want to ask questions. But this place is really, really good. West 44th and 8th Street, John's Pizzeria.

Now, here's the thing. Long before I ever ate at John's Pizzeria, a man by the name of A.B. Simpson, has anybody heard of A.B. Simpson? Okay, A.B. Simpson used to hang out there.

He worked there. He was a Canadian preacher because John's Pizzeria is in what used to be known as the Gospel Tabernacle on 44th and 8th. So it's in an old church. It's beautiful. beautiful, beautiful stained glass windows. Now, it does say something about what New York City values, church or pizza. Granted, this is true.

But it's in an old church building. And he was a Canadian preacher, A.B. Simpson, and theologian who pastored there in the late 1800s. He later went on to found the CNMA, the Christian and Missionary Alliance. And the only remnant of the fact that the gospel may have been preached there are the stained glass windows that you see. And there's a big stained glass skylight.

It's very, very pretty. And I eat pizza there. It's great pizza. It's a beautiful setting, but unfortunately it's a dead church. I think John's Pizzeria, this is a very long way of making this example, is a good example to what has happened to the term fellowship within the church today. I think we take the term and have turned it into something that doesn't even remotely represent what it was intended to be.

So that's what has happened to John's Pizzeria. Great pizza, but when you walk in there, and it's, I mean, you've got to go. It's an awesome place, and the way they've decked it out is great. But still, as you look around, particularly as a Bible-believing Christian, there's just a twinge of sadness. Wow, this is not what this place was intended to be.

Something else happened here. Something else used to happen here that definitely doesn't happen here anymore. I think sometimes Christians you and me do that to the term fellowship There a remnant just like there are truly beautiful stained glass windows in John pizzeria but it not functioning the way it once was the way it was intended to We do that with the term fellowship.

We've kind of hijacked it and taken it to places that I don't think Koine Greek writers of scripture who wrote Kynonia ever meant for us to take it there. I think lots of what we call fellowship is at best, helloship. That's what I call the fellowship that we just kind of, we hang out. And it's really more, hello, hello, hello, hello. It's a fellowship hour.

It's a fellowship time. We had great fellowship. Fellowship, it may not have been a bad thing, but fellowship, I think the best definition that I've ever heard of, I read it years ago, I think it was John Loftness who said, fellowship is a uniquely Christian relational experience. Fellowship is a uniquely Christian relational experience. I think we do a lot of uniquely Christian things, right?

What we're doing right now is fairly uniquely Christian. It's a Saturday snowy morning. We're gathered together at a church. We're going to talk about the word of God. That's fairly uniquely Christian, right? This isn't super relational.

There's one guy talking in the front of a room. You're all staring at me in the back of the person's head in front of you unless you're seated in this row. This is not very relational or social, but it is uniquely Christian. I think there's lots of times that we do things that are very social. That's great. We'll hang out.

We'll have a potluck. We'll enjoy each other's company. Do you do cornhole? Cornhole? Yeah, cornhole. Cornhole, horseshoes, whatever.

Throw on a football, a baseball. We do things that are social and fun. They're not sinful. They're not sinful. but they're not necessarily uniquely Christian. We are good at doing things that are uniquely Christian. I think we're good at doing things that are uniquely social.

Fellowship is the marriage of the two and I think that's sometimes where we miss it. We're marrying together something that's uniquely Christian but then also relational. That's typically where it breaks down. We don't always marry the two together well. We're good at uniquely Christian. We're good at relational.

The marriage of the two, though, is going to take time and effort. It's going to take more than a bulletin announcement and more than someone just organizing it. It going to take time and effort on your part and my part to say I want to make this something uniquely Christian I going to make this fellowship I going to make this something uniquely Christian and relational so that I can have a means of grace at work in my life.

Fellowship is a uniquely Christian relational experience. So I ask you to turn to Acts chapter 2. I really should do that to. Acts chapter 2. And I want to look, this is a fairly topical session where I would like for us to look at some examples of fellowship. We don't have time to look at tons, but we'll look at three things that the Word of God has to say about fellowship.

So Acts chapter two. It's the end of Peter's sermon. Pick it up in verse 37. So, actually pick it up in verse 36. We'll end with his closing line. Let all the house of Israel therefore know for certain that God has made him both Lord and Christ, this Jesus whom you crucified. verse 37 now when they heard this they were cut to the heart and said to peter and the rest of the apostles that the the response that every pastor wants people to say after he preached the word what shall we do what do we do with this truth that we've just heard peter said to them repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of jesus christ for the forgiveness of your sins and you will receive the gift of the holy spirit for the promises for you and for your children and will and for all who are far off everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself and with many other words he bore witness and continuing to exhort them saying save yourselves from this crooked generation so those who received his word were baptized and they were added that day about 3,000 souls not the most politically correct feel good your best life now message but 3,000 souls were added to the church in that day as Peter preached on the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, hard truth.

Look at verse 42. And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And all came upon every soul. And many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common They were selling their possessions and belongings distributing the proceeds to all as any had need And day by day attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people.

And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved. So here we see the preaching of God's word, God doing an incredible work among the people, saving thousands of people. It's not a feel-good, easy-believism type of message. It's not a, come on, don't worry, the buses will wait. This is Peter doing a really hard, truthful message to people.

We ended with that verse, hey, this Jesus that you crucified is Lord, and rules, and reigns, and people, wow, what do we do? Repent, be baptized, be saved. And then what we see in verse 42 is what they did. They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching. That's great. And the fellowship.

Then it goes on to extrapolate what that looked like. The breaking of bread and the prayers. They broke bread together. We see that mentioned later on in verse 46 that they break bread in their homes. 46 says day by day attending the temple. big church gatherings, and then in their homes, smaller gatherings. They broke bread together.

They received their food with glad and generous hearts. But this had to happen with a level of intentionality. It especially has to happen with a level of intentionality today because we don't really need each other on a day-to-day basis. We can function rather well individually, right? So there's not that much of this communal living that was happening more so then.

But friends, I would say we need to think a little bit more along those lines because God does something when we're rubbing shoulders with one another. God does something as we intentionally spend that time with one another and we have those friendships and that fellowship with one another. He does things that he doesn't always do when we're sitting in rows like this.

That there's an opportunity there for something. Look at verse 43. All came upon every soul. Wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. All who believed were together had all things in common. So there was a commonality that existed among people who wanted to live life together.

And that's harder for us to do. We're not going to have all things in common, but surely we can have some things in common. But I bring this up to say this, our society fights against this. I'm my own person, I'm a self-made man, I'm an individual woman, we're our own family. We hunker down and we shut the shades and this is where we live, this is our thing.

And I'm just saying, what we need to do is realize we're missing something if that's how we live our lives as Christians. We're not going to have the benefits of fellowship. And then we'll get together and we'll have a lot of helloship. Hi. Hey. You pass each other in the hall all the way.

Hi. Hi. Hi. It's not bad, but let's not call it a great time of fellowship. Or we'll sit down and we'll enjoy a meal together. And that's great.

But if we're not being intentional to make something uniquely Christian about that, we just enjoyed a meal together. Not a sin. Certainly better than cooking up things in a meth lab or something. It's not a bad thing. But let's not call it uniquely Christian. It's a meal.

It's good, but it's not great. It's just a meal. Here, I see the saints having all things together in common. Verse 45, they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all as any had need. I'm not saying we need to go out and sell everything and then all work out of one communal kitty, but they were aware of each other's needs.

Do you see that? They were aware of each other's needs. How were they aware of each other's needs? Because they were in each other's lives. How were they aware of each other's needs? Because they spoke to one another about what was going on in their lives.

That's the benefits of fellowship. So look at what they value. Don't necessarily look at what they did. So we have to do exactly the same thing. No, they obviously valued helping one another, valued being involved in each other's lives to the point where they would know how to help one another, and they did that. Verse 46, day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, large gatherings, small gatherings.

They received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved. God blesses the fellowship of believers to do great and mighty things in their lives. What about you? As you think back on this week, this month, this year, we about a quarter of the way in is there a lot of fellowship in your life Or is it more helloship Remember helloship not a sin Hi.

Hey, how you doing? Good to see you. How's it going? Not a sin. But helloship is not fellowship. It's just being polite.

It's nice at ease. It's... How's it going? Cool. Hey man, what's going on? But it's not uniquely Christian.

Do you have a lot of uniquely Christian relational experiences in your everyday life, week to week? Is there a way that you strive to cultivate that within your life and the lives of others around you? Take a look at Philippians chapter 2. Philippians chapter 2 turn there or scroll there app in your lap or Bible open Philippians chapter 2 Look at the Word of God in Philippians 2, beginning in verse 1.

So if there's any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Paul seems to really emphasize here the desire that he has for the church at Philippi to be united. One accord, one mind, stick together.

But he says this, if there's any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, there's a participatory thing. He's calling these people in the church at Philippi whom he dearly loves to participate in what the Spirit is doing. Now, that's not to say that God is, you know, up in heaven, and he's got his hands tied, and he wants to do great things in your life, and won't you please let him?

He's so helpless without you. I mean, like, he's God, right? He doesn't really need us to untie his hands. He's never had his hands tied. If you've seen the picture, Behold, I Stand at the Doorknock, does anybody know what I'm talking about? Where Jesus is on the outside and he wants to come into your life but there no doorknob on his side of the door Isn that so sad That the Son of God can get through a door without a doorknob So sad.

You need to open the door. It's very sad. No? No? Because the Holy Spirit just did a little B&E and broke in, did a little break and enter, and broke into your hard heart and kicked in the door and came in the back and put something up against you and said, open the door. You're like, okay.

You open the door and Jesus comes in. That's not directly related to what we're talking about. That's called a rant. That's what happens when you step away from your notes and you get on the soapbox. I'm going to get off my soapbox. God is sovereign.

Yes and amen. Philippians 2. If there's any participation, if there's any encouragement, any comfort, any love, any participation in the Spirit, there is a cooperative nature between our relationship with God. He's not waiting for us. I can't move, I can't do things without you. He's not hogtied, he's not hamstrung, but we participate in the work of the Spirit within us.

We participate in that. It takes intentionality. If there's any participation in the Spirit, any affection, any sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord, and of one mind, realizing, wow, we are more than just friends. We are, this is fellowship. This is something that's important. This is kinonia.

This is a uniquely Christian relational experience. I want to participate with one another and in what the Spirit is doing within our lives. But here's the thing. I don't know what the Spirit's doing in your life, and you don't know what the Spirit's doing in his life, and he doesn't know what the Spirit's doing in her life, and do you need to know? No.

We've gotten along fine thus far, right? But we ought to. Because I don't know what the Holy Spirit's doing in your life. But it might be very different from what he's doing in mine. And you also don't know what I'm going through, what I'm wrestling with, what I'm doubting, that I shouldn't be doubting, but I'm a human being. Sometimes we can be functional atheists, forgetting that God is who he is and he did what he said he would do.

But by me hearing what the Lord is doing in your life, it encourages me or corrects me or sets me back on the path that I need to be on But if we not talking about those things I missing out You missing out We missing out And what the Lord is doing in each other lives may remind us of something in God's Word that we had forgotten because we're finite, fickle people and we just forget things easily. And we're squirreled. We're just easily distracted.

But then you tell me something that reminds me of just how good God is. participation in the Spirit. If we're not, but here's what you have to understand. That's not just going to happen with Pastor Tim's preaching. It's a separate thing. It's not going to happen with Pastor Peter's preaching. So if this is the extent of your uniquely Christian experiences in your life, you're missing out.

It's a good thing. I'm glad you're here. I hope you stay here. What I'm talking about is the stuff that the sermons, when Tim and I stop preaching, and we do eventually stop preaching. When we stop preaching, this is the stuff that causes the sermon to keep preaching. Because then you go home and you talk amongst each other.

I don't know, maybe you work together and at some point you have a conversation about the word that was preached or something that's going on in your life. and this is what extends the ministry of the word and the spirit from Sunday to Monday to a Tuesday evening to a random Wednesday text to a Thursday and it's not just this oh we come to church to hear the word of God and Sunday oh I'm so happy we're here I haven't heard it all week I kind of read my bible but I kind of don't and then I go and I do the things and Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday oh back to church oh refresh me feed me I need to be fed we can be in each other's lives and have these uniquely Christian relational experiences and seeing what the Spirit is doing in each other's lives. Turn to Philemon 6. You know what, look at verse, we'll pick it up in verse 4.

Oh heck, we'll pick it up in verse 1. Philemon, verse 1. Paul, a prisoner for Christ Jesus and Timothy, our brother, to Philemon, a beloved fellow worker, and Aphia, our sister, and Archippus, our fellow servant. soldier and the church in your house. Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Verse 4, I thank my God always and I remember you in my prayers because I hear of your love and of the faith that you have toward the Lord Jesus and for all the saints and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.

Look at that term sharing of your faith. if I ask you let's do another real question so not rhetorical if I've asked you if you've shared your faith lately what do you think I'm talking about what comes to mind yeah that's what Philemon's talking about personally for me if you say have you shared your faith lately does anybody think of something else I think of witnessing or evangelizing that's typically what I think of when it comes to sharing my faith have you had an opportunity to share your faith on the plane Yeah, I actually did. I spoke to somebody. Do you have an opportunity to share your faith at work?

Yeah, I had an opportunity. I invited someone to church and I told them about it. I'm a Christian. Great. Great. Do that.

May your tribe increase. Do that. Continue doing that. That's not what Philemon's talking about here. When Philemon in verse 6 says, I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ, he's talking about us sharing our faith with one another, encouraging one another with the faith that we have.

Yes, share your faith. Yes, evangelize. yes, reach out to the lost, but this is an opportunity for me to share with you my faith or my lack of faith, or for you to share with me your faith and what the Lord is doing in your life and in your heart, or what you wish he would, or where you feel dry, where you need prayer, where you need confidence, not in yourself, but in God. That's not going to happen if we don't make an intention to do that.

We won't just trip into that. It's not a cold. We're not just going to catch it. I've just caught some fellowship. That's awesome. It's not the flu.

It takes intentionality, a uniquely Christian relational experience. So fellowship, participation, sharing, these are words that imply not only action, but we'll have to take some planning on our part. So here's what I would like to do. I want to suggest to you in the time that we have left some ways that we can maybe do this Now I going to suggest to you a lot of things a lot of things Don commit to doing all the things because you won I would encourage you to commit to trying to do one thing We leave church, we say, oh, Pastor Peter gave us, you know, 11 teen things to look at.

I'm going to do them all, like tomorrow, because I love God and I'm fired up. When you say you're going to do all of them, you're setting the bar up here, and then when you do three, do you see yourself have passed or failed? Failed. I'm encouraging you to do it slowly over time and to think, you know what? What is the one? One!

The one thing that I can try to work into my life that maybe I don't do at all, I'm a little weakened. Now, there's someone in here who's like, I'm going to do two. He doesn't know me. kind of a big deal. I'm a pretty serious Christian. That's fine. But whenever I'm with a counselee, and they're not in their Bible at all, they don't have a regular time with the Lord, they just kind of, every once in a while, like, flip it open, do this, look at it, they don't have a regular time with the Lord.

I don't go from zero to 60 with my counselees. Alright, here's what I want you to do. I want you to, this week, I want you to read the Bible every day. Do you think it's going to happen? You think it's going to happen? Just boom!

They haven't been reading their Bible. I tell them, I'd like you to read your Bible one time between now and the next time we meet. And then they do, and there's high fives all around. You know what I tell them the next week? I'd like them to read their Bible one time. You know what sometimes happens?

They come back and go, you know, I actually read it three times. Oh, that's awesome. What if I said I wanted to do it every day? Then it's only three, right? Bill. build. So just build.

Pick one. Wow. Two. Cool. Three. Work them into your life and not like, I'm going to do all the things to get them all done.

Okay. Anyway, so let's get into them. How might we do this? What are things that we can do to foster uniquely Christian relational experiences together? We can pray for one another. Praying for one another, it's kind of like, okay, that's a gimme, right?

We kind of knew that we could pray for one another. But I don't mean pray for one another in general, I mean pray for one another specifically. One of the easiest questions to ask someone is hey is there a way I can pray for you I going to be talking to God soon I like to talk to him about you What can I talk to him about specifically If I going to I always think of it this way wow you know if Tim going to carve out time in his day to talk to God for me, what do I want to talk to him about?

It's pretty cool. If you're going to talk to God, here's what's laying on my heart. I've got this thing with the kids, I've got this thing at church, this thing in my own heart, you know, and I'm going to, yeah, let's use that time well. Let's make pay while the sun shines. It's a country thing. So let's do it, but that's going to take intentionality if Tim's going to want to pray for me specifically and not generally.

General prayers are cool, but uniquely Christian relational experiences is when I'm praying for you because you are wrestling with anxiety that you don't want to be wrestling with anymore. And you're more anxious than most people know. And you hide it well, but really, you've got a hole developing in your stomach because it's tied in knots all the time.

And I can pray for you on that. But if we don't have that conversation, I'm just going to pray that you have a nice day and you don't trip over anything, which is fine. But it's not uniquely Christian relational experience. Let's try to pray for one another specifically. We can serve one another specifically, being in touch with one another, knowing what's going on in our lives.

Flip over to Galatians chapter 6. Galatians chapter 6. Take a look at verse 1. Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Bearing one another's burdens is an important thing. Look at verse 1 Brothers if anyone is caught in any transgression so if anyone is caught in any transgression pretty broad right You who are spiritual as in you who are a Christian should restore him in a spirit of gentleness Keep watch on yourself lest you too be tempted. I'm convinced that there would be less people struggling with life-dominating sins.

Life-dominating sins. I mean, we all, none of us are sinless, but we strive to sin less, right? We strive to grow and change and become more like Christ. But a life-dominating sin, that's a term we use in biblical counseling, and this is a sin that dominates our lives. It's just ingrained within us. It's had a presence in our life for so long that it's become part of our character.

It's really, really scary stuff. I'm convinced that we would see people struggle less with life-dominating sins if there was more fellowship on the front end and there was more uniquely Christian relational experience because the person who is in some grievous, deep, dark, twisted, sad, life-dominating sin didn't start out that way. It didn't start out the way it got that way.

But it probably started out over here with an ungrateful heart. Right? A lack of gratitude. Something that seems fairly benign but is fairly serious. And if you spend enough time around me and you hear me complaining, it's always the kids and the job and the wife and the bills, and it's just constant complaining, and you're in my life enough and you hear me complaining, you might call to my attention when I'm right here.

Turn me around, right? Long before the ungratefulness turns into bitterness and the bitterness turns into self-pity and self-pity makes me constantly think, here's what I deserve, here's why nobody knows the troubles I've seen, nobody knows my sorrows, and then all of a sudden I find myself feeding myself on sin and crud in my life that I shouldn't have in my life at all. But if I had a uniquely Christian relational experience with a brother who cared to say, you know, I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, but you complain, like, often.

A lot. And I do, and who among us hasn't? But I bet there's things in your life you can be grateful for. When that conversation happens here, oftentimes it prevents people from going the distance, way over here, right? We can help to bear one another's burdens on the front end before it gets really, really serious. Is it going to work every time?

Of course not. We live in a fallen, broken world. But being in each other's lives and having those uniquely Christian relational experiences can sometimes cause us to throw up a warning sign or to say, hey, let me help you with this. I don't know, do you have a minute? I just want to talk to you about something. I love you enough to tell you this.

And I know you would want to tell me that. So are things cool? You seem uniquely stressed. You seem really, really upset a lot. You seem like you have a short temper. The things that you've been brought up that the kids have frustrated with, they're not that big.

But to you, they're very big. The thing's okay. Those conversations have to happen. And that's how we can bear one another's burdens. Because someone's caught in a transgression, not there, but right over here. And then they become more caught and more caught and more caught and more caught and more caught and they're in bondage and they get all the way over here and they're ensnared and they're in a life-dominating sin pattern of some sort.

But if we're in each other's lives, we can do things that might prevent that. Bearing one another's burdens. We can share spiritual experiences. So I'll give you two from our small group. Sarah and I lead a small group in our church. And we've done two things that I think have been particularly helpful.

One was a thankfulness journal. We were going through this. Sarah and I decided, you know what, for our small group, let's do these booklets. And we'll do like, you know, one a week or one every other week. We did this little booklet on thankfulness for four months. Do you remember that?

It was like leading up to Thanksgiving. Oh, it'll be nice. Thanksgiving, pilgrims, fun. Let's do a thankfulness booklet. Okay, we'll talk about gratitude. We literally did that booklet week after week for the vast majority of that quarter of the year.

Because thankfulness is a deep well to jump into and to really really consider It just provoked a lot of discussion And so then we started thankfulness journals where we would jot down things that we thankful for They're not impressive. It's just things that we're thankful for. It forced us at the end of the day to jot down in a little notebook something that we're thankful for.

It could be something major, something minor, but we realize there's always a reason to praise. That Habakkuk mentality. I will always praise God, even though there might be no food, There might be no animals in the stalls, no food. There's always a reason to praise, and it causes us to be thankful. We share that experience with one another. Now our small group is actually working.

We're working through Philippians. And in order to not just make it like fun facts, I like how he says this. If you've been a Christian long enough, if you've been in any discussion group, I like how he says this. It's like, yeah, I know. The dude published in the Word of God. He's probably awesome.

Let's not talk about how much we like him. I like how it says that. I like how he says that. So just to make sure that our discussion doesn't just turn into that, or like fun facts that we learn about the book of Philippians to impress people at parties, we try to have people at the end of our time together try to come up with an I will statement. We talk about Philippians.

Great conversation. Every once in a while it gets a little off track, comes back. It's just your typical small group discussion. and the goal at the end is to see if you can come up with an I will statement. Based on our discussion, what's something that the Lord has laid on your heart that you will do? So you have to start out the sentence with I will.

Sometimes people don't. I'm not mature enough to let that go. So you have to say I will. So I will. You know what? I think I will look for areas in my life where I'm anxious so I can not be. you know what I will I will consider what we've discussed today about the mind of Christ and being in one accord with people or you know what and lots of times they're really specific and the rule is you're also allowed to cheat and steal so it's not a competition sometimes it gets a little competitive because I said what did I say a couple weeks ago like I will it was something and I put a number on it and I set the bar low and then build so I said I will a what?

Reading? Yeah something like that Really changed my life But yeah it was something and I said I will do this I will look for someone this week to greet with grace and peace. Maybe it was something like that. And then another lady in our small office goes, that's good, I'm going to do that for three people. I'm like, oh, oh, okay. I'm going to do it for four.

Like, you know, yeah, you want to go? Let's go. Like chest bumping, like kids out in a playground. but you're allowed to steal. So if I say something to someone and Tim says, yeah, I want to do that too. There's no shame in that. So it's not like you have to come up with something really cool and awesome.

It's a small group for crying out loud. None of us are getting an award for this. Try to come up with an I will statement so that we can hear about how you're going to apply the word of God this week. And it's been really cool. Sharing those spiritual experiences together through a thankfulness journal or just coming up with I will statements. Turn to James chapter 5.

This is an interesting one. James chapter 5 and verse 16. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. For the effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. Because there's like six verses in my life that I will forever quote in the Old King James.

I don't know why, but that's one of them. Availeth much. John 10, or 11 rather, Lazarus, for by now he stinketh. That's just an awesome verse in the King James. Anyway, James 5, 16, Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. You know that confessing your sins to one another is probably one of perhaps the hardest things to do, but the best thing to do.

And this isn't confess your sins against one another, like I've sinned against you, sister. I've sinned against you, brother. This is just hey here where I off And I need prayer Here where I off You don know this but you should see me at home I'm a bear to deal with. I'm short-tempered with the kids. I'm kicking the dog. I'm snapping at my wife.

Everybody laughs when I say I'm kicking the dog. I never mean to make people laugh. Everyone's like, kick the dog. But I'm short-tempered with my family. I'm not helping them, I'm not encouraging them. I need some prayer.

These are what we see as the little things, the acceptable sins, that if we could be confessing them to one another, you know. Tim, I don't know what I'm doing with my life. There's nine crumpled up resignation letters in my office waste paper basket. I have no hope. I know God is using maybe me, but I just want for him to tell. Ministry is hard.

Life is hard. I lack hope. I lack. Tim is a great pastor of pastors. He's only as great as what people tell him. That came out wrong.

He can only help me insofar as what I tell him. There we go. That's what I meant. Yeah, that came out wrong. He can only pray for me and help me in the things that I tell him. We can pray for one another and help one another if we'll tell each other things, if we'll confess sins to one another.

But if we're too proud to do that, or too busy to do that, or don't see a value in doing that, we won't confess sins to one another. We won't correct one another. We won't pray for one another. So finally, I'm going to give you four hindrances to fellowship that I 100% legit stole from J.I. Packer. They're from an essay he wrote in 1981 called God's Words.

And they are four hindrances to fellowship that could be at work in your life and my life. One is self-sufficiency. I can make it on my own. I don't need... What Pastor Peter is saying is something that might be nice, but I don't need it. Well, Pastor Peter's saying it's something that might be cool, but it's not a need.

It's like an add-on, right? Yeah, I'll take a second, Cherry. It's an add-on. It's just a little thing. I don't need that. It might be nice.

Do one of these. Smile. Smile away, boys. That's right. Just looking at... Yeah.

It's nice. It's really good. Very encouraging. But really, I can make it on my own. I don't need other people. It would be nice.

I don't need other people. I'm self-sufficient. I can teach myself. I can read God's Word. I can pray on my own. We rationalize our ways, and when we rationalize, we make rational lies.

So when we rationalize, we just start telling ourselves lies that make sense. Why? What? I'm going to confess my sin to Tim so that Tim can pray for me? I can pray on my own. You can, but there's something about, Bonhoeffer talks about experiencing the presence of God in the eyes of a brother.

There's something about a brother or a sister looking at you, telling you truth, that God uses. I don't have to confess my sin. I confess my sin straight to God. I'm a former Roman Catholic. I don't need to confess my sin to any person. There's one mediator between God and man.

It's the Lord Jesus Christ. Like, I can, we can do this, right? We can just, oh no, I don't need to do that. I can make it on my own. self-sufficiency will be the death of us. That's number one. Number two, formality.

Formality. I would tell you, but this isn't the time or the place. That's just... We'll wait for a better time. I don't feel like it's appropriate for me to ask for that right now. I probably shouldn't ask him.

I probably shouldn't confess to him. He shouldn't ask me. We can't do that now. church is starting, they started the music we've got to get the thing formality, there's an appropriateness an appropriate way, like oh wait I've got to make sure that it's, I can't do this if it's a day of the week ending in a Y, I can't do this if we're not wearing the right clothes, I can't do this if we're not so this formality will will be the end of us, it'll stand in the way of fellowship self formality bitterness from past experiences unmet expectations make people bitter People who have been offended make people bitter Gossip and slander make people bitter.

Jealousy makes people bitter. And sometimes people have spent enough time in the church, right, in the church to realize that the marriage between Jesus and his bride, the church, Jesus is great, but his bride can be a bear. And the church is not perfect and people take those bad experiences that they have and say, you know what, I'm not engaging. I'm just going to show up, put my little money in the thing, listen to the sermon, and leave.

Fellowship is fine. You're lucky I'm getting that. Self-sufficiency, formality, bitterness, and lastly, elitism. I feel like I can help him, but I don't know if he can really help me. It might be one way. I don't know if that's a good, if I should really invest in that relationship.

You know, I'd love to tell this brother and ask him for a prayer, but we just met. It might be weird. What if he doesn't pray right? I think he might pray with his eyes open. I don't know if it'll take. you know, like, does he have a good signal? Like, I don't know.

I get, I think I get her, but I don't know if she really gets me. And I just feel like maybe we should not, it's just elitism. I don't want to be like, I'm kind of here and she's kind of here, here. And I don't know if that's really, what if I, what if I burden her with my prayer request and that she's super burden. This elitism that keeps us from pressing into one another will stand in the way of our fellowship Four hindrances to fellowship Self formality bitterness and elitism So, what about you?

Think of an I will statement. Think of a next step. think of a already existing opportunity you have don't create a new meeting at least not right now probably opportunities you have that you interact with one another with the people of God that exist already and you're like you know what the next time we do our Saturday morning oatmeal bar I assume you do that every Saturday no? I'm kidding but the next time that I'm having a meal with someone at church we're going to talk about life and the game and the family and the kids and it's going to be great we're going to laugh, we're going to poke fun, but I'm going to make sure that at some point I do something uniquely Christian.

I don't know what it's going to be, but maybe I'm going to share something that I read in the Word, or I'm going to say, hey, is there a way I can pray for you this week? I'm going to do something. One thing. No, I'm going to do all the things. Don't do all the things. One thing.

How do you make one of those relational this strikes me as a relational church. If not, you know an odd amount about how each other cook. So it strikes me that you're a very social and relational church, you're in each other's lives, just take one of those opportunities you have that you're already in each other's lives and say, how can I just add a uniquely Christian twist to that, that I can make sure that there's something uniquely Christian about the conversation that we have about life and music and sports and fun and the funny thing that happened at work, and then I'm also going to say, hey, if you would this week, just pray for me because remember that bad week I've had?

I'm angry a lot. I not an angry person but I angry a lot I don want to be angry Pray that I wouldn be angry I don want to be a jerk I don want to be angry Use your prayer He might then next week say I've been praying for you. How's it going? And then it's happening. It's a thing. This is now a thing.

He has something to pray for me about. He can ask me how I'm doing. He says, I'm going to keep you accountable. Huh, okay. What's your name again? You keep me accountable?

Are you going to use an app or a list? What do you mean? Where it's just happening kind of naturally. Hey, I prayed for you. How's that going? Is it better this week?

No? Alright, I'll keep praying. Was it better this week? Sweet. That's an answer to prayer. Where can you do that in your life in ready-made opportunities right now to take hellishhip and move it into fellowship?

Think about that. Come up with an I will statement. And let's see what the Lord might do. Father, we come to you thankful for the example that's set for us in your word. Thankful most importantly for Jesus Christ. That we can have these experiences, not just so we can grow closer to one another and so we can feel better about being Christian, but so that we can really experience something that we cannot experience in and of ourselves by ourselves.

But we really believe that you are at work in unique and different ways in each and every member of your body. And that the fingers are really benefited by the arm being strengthened and that the heart being encouraged really helps out the mind. That's how we roll. That's how you've made us. Help us to want to lean into that, to better know one another and to better understand what you're doing in each and every one of us so that we can be and see each other as more than just friends but as the friends that you've called us to be according to your word.

We pray in Jesus' name. Amen. Thank you.