Holiness & Sex?

Take your Bibles this morning and let's turn to 1 Thessalonians chapter 4. 1 Thessalonians chapter 4. Let's pray. Let's pray. Father we come to you our holy God who finds sin abhorrent in his sight we come to you in confidence today knowing that because of Jesus you not only allow us into your presence. You welcome us and you embrace us.

You love us. Undeserving as we are. We thank you for your love for us that sent the Savior to deliver us. That we might find joy, confidence, and love in your presence. And now as we sit here, as the people of God in your presence minister your word to us. help us to understand your desires and your will, your intentions for us. And we'll thank you in Jesus' name.

Amen. I want to begin this morning by asking some questions. Do you have friends who are unmarried and living together? What do you think of that? Is that wrong? is it okay to pursue a homosexual lifestyle if you believe that you're gay i mean if a person has a gay orientation should you declare such a thing as wrong can you enter into a sexual relationship with someone whom you love the one you know is your true love the one you know that is meant for you when you get to be about in your teens or young adult years you hear that hormones are raging Is there anything you can do about that except to make sure you engage in that safely?

If you were to ask those questions in your high school classroom or at the barbecue you know what the answer should be don you You know what would be expected But if we have any kind of conversation about sex, we cannot do so without using terms like God's will, sanctification, purity, swindling, even vengeance. The Apostle Paul enters that conversation now in 1 Thessalonians chapter 4. in our text this morning, which is verses 3 through 8. I'm going to read verses 1 through 8.

We get the whole context then and hear what he has to say. Finally then, brothers, we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus that as you receive from us how you ought to walk and to please God, just as you are doing, that you do so more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God, that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you.

For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore, whoever disregards this, disregards not man, but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you. Now remember that the Apostle Paul, beginning in chapter 4, is addressing this issue. How do you live in a way that pleases God? And pleasing God grows out of the great work he has done for us in Christ.

The gospel calls with good news of a Savior who rescues us from God's wrath. But the gospel then calls you to live for God, to please God, because he has rescued you from his wrath. The gospel says that because you have been rescued, you must, as he told the Thessalonians, as he's told us in chapter two, you must walk in a manner worthy of God who calls you into his own kingdom and glory.

And so the apostle writes these last chapters about how those who have been called by God into his kingdom and glory, how we ought to live in a manner worthy of that calling. In chapters 4 and 5, he begins to tell us that. And he tells us things like, how should we love one another? And things like your work, your job. Things like living in hope and how to relate to church leaders and how to live a life of rejoicing and prayer and about how to help others and about sex Yes the Gospel calls us to live in a certain way as sexual beings Because God rescued us from sin and wrath, we now have a different sexual ethic than anybody else.

Now before we look at this passage, we need to define one very important term, and that's found in verse 4. It says, I'm sorry, in verse 3, that you abstain from, here's the term, sexual immorality. What does he mean by that? Actually, in the Greek text, that's just one word. It's the word pornea. Now obviously, you know what we get from that word.

It's pornography. But back in that day, pornea did not mean pornography. They didn't have printing presses. they obviously didn't have the internet it's not talking about how to have access to particular images the word porneia is a very general term used in scripture which denotes all sexual expression outside of heterosexual marriage if we were to sum up all of the bible and you heard some of it this morning in the old testament what what god said under the old covenant how he defined sexual immorality there.

So as we look at the Bible, the word porneia means all sexual expression outside of heterosexual marriage. That is homosexuality, premarital sex, adultery, pedophilia, incest, prostitution, bestiality, any kind of sexual expression outside of the bonds of heterosexual marriage. That's what he means in that term sexual immorality. That's the key term in this passage.

That's what it means. It covers all of those. And what do we find here? We find this. God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives. God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives.

Let's look at our text in verses 3 through 8. For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lusts like the Gentiles who do not know God, that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you For God has not called us for impurity but in holiness therefore whoever disregards this disregards not man but God who gives his Holy Spirit to you Here's the first thing we need to understand God expects you to live distinctive lives. What is God's will for you?

What we're asking is what does God intend for you? What does God expect from his people? You know what God expects. You know his intention for you from his commandments. So, moms, you know when your kids come to you and they say, Mom, what does Dad want me to do? And your response is, well, what did he tell you to do?

Right? What does God want us to do? What's his intention? What's his will? That's what we're asking here. And Paul says, here's God's will. this, namely your sanctification is God's will for you.

What is God's will? That you be holy. The word sanctification, holy, same word, that you be holy. Now what does that mean? What does that mean? What's the idea?

The idea behind the word holy comes from a Hebrew word that means to cut or to separate. And so the idea of holiness is not just living a particular way. The idea is that you have been separated from sin and separated to God. You have been separated from this in order to be dedicated to this. You got it? It has the idea of separation in it.

The idea is that you are distinctive. So when we say that God is holy, we are saying that God is separated entirely from sin and separated, if you will, to himself. We're also saying this about God. He's entirely separated from creation and he is his own being. He's not a created being. He's totally separate.

He's holy in that sense as well. And so for us, we're separated from sin and separated to God. We've been separated from this and consecrated to that, dedicated to that. That ought to show up as a distinctive people. We are distinctive. this has always been God's intention for his people turn very quickly to Exodus chapter 19 verses 5 and 6 you heard it in Leviticus today you've heard the words we're going to read here you've already heard them in Leviticus but God's intention for his people Israel under the old covenant was what that they sanctified, that they be holy, that they be distinctive.

Here's what it reads. Now therefore, if you will indeed obey my voice and keep my commandment, you shall be my treasured possession among all peoples, for all the earth is mine. And you shall be to me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. God had separated that nation for himself from all the other nations in the world, right? He had chosen this nation.

They were his. They were his treasured. All the nations belonged to him. This is his treasured possession. They're distinctive. They're holy in their position.

They belong to God in a special way, unlike all the other nations. And if they obeyed God in the covenant, then they would live in a distinctively different way than all the other nations. They would then be a holy nation, holy in practice. You see? now God's will God's intention God's goal has not changed since then God's goal remains the same in the gospel those who believe in Christ have been separated from sin to God that's their holy position and they are now distinct from all other peoples in the way that they live Holy in practice.

They're distinctive. Now listen, the goal of the gospel is not just to get you to heaven. The goal of the gospel primarily, I believe primarily, is to produce a people who are distinctive. A group of people who are, like Israel, a holy nation. A group of people who stand out from the rest of humanity. They're distinctive.

So what is God's will for you? Your sanctification, he says. That is, God expects you to live distinctive lives. Alright? God expects you to live distinctive lives. But he doesn't stop there.

God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives. In our sexual lives, we are to be distinctive. We are to be separate. We're to be different than anyone else. Well, what does that mean when I make that comment? Well notice what he says in verse 3 He gives us three ways Number one that you abstain from all sexual immorality Number two that you know how to control your body Number three that you do not transgress and wrong your brother or sister Alright?

Those are the things that are going to set us apart in our sexual lives. They're going to make us distinctive. God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives. Firstly, He says, display your distinctiveness by your abstinence. by your abstinence. Verse 3. That you abstain from sexual immorality.

God does not call the church to moderate their sexual impulses. But to abstain completely. To absolutely abstain completely from all forms of sexual immorality. Now, let me just say this. It's very quick, so you don't get the wrong impression. God's not against sex.

You read some of the Bible passages like Proverbs 5, you don't read that one in mixed company. God tells us to delight in our sexual lives. But here he's saying you abstain from all sexual immorality. The church is called to completely abstain, not moderate, abstain from all forms of sexual immorality. But we intend on getting married. We intend on getting married, so it must be okay.

No, it's not. No, it's not. But if you're gay, it's okay. No, it's not. As a professed Christian involved in sexual sin once said to me, after I read him some relevant scriptural passages about this whole issue, and he refused, he refused to deal with it, he says to me, I know what the Bible says, but I don't feel like it's sin. and I don't have to repent because I don't feel convicted that it's a sin and the point here is it doesn't matter what your intentions are it doesn't matter what you think it doesn't matter what you feel God calls Christians, the church to abstain from all forms of sexual immorality and sexual immorality is not defined by your intentions by your thinking or your feeling.

It is defined by the will of God in the scriptures. I remember saying to this man it doesn matter what you feel like it defined right here It says it wrong Regardless of how you feel it what it says That's what defines sexual immorality. And we'll be distinctive because we will make a total break with our culture. Wouldn't you agree? If we abstain from all forms of sexual immorality, we're totally different than our culture.

Right? Our culture says, if you feel it, do it. Essentially. If you're married and you feel like you love someone else, well then dissolve that marriage and go live with the other person. Doesn't matter in our culture any longer. This is a total break with our culture.

You know what grieves me terribly? Is there are many church bodies today who flagrantly disregard exactly what we just read. There are churches today who are arguing, who on some have already accepted the idea that homosexuality is okay as long as it's monogamous. As long as you just would want, it's okay. I don't know why you draw the line there. If you get rid of one line, why draw the line there?

Or, you know, hey, if you're living together, no problem. You can be a member. You can do all those things. There's no sweat. Hey, all those things. It doesn't matter.

There are church bodies today who are teaching, who are no different than the culture. None. They're just like a religious little varnish on the culture as a whole. The point is this would be a total break with our culture. Our abstinence from all forms of sexual immorality ought to make us distinctive in this sex-crazed culture in which we live. Now, how else are we distinctive?

God says, display your distinctiveness by your self-control in verses 4 and 5. What does he say there? That each of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God. Learn to control your body, first of all, rather than imitating the unbridled passion of unbelievers. The sexual ethic of our day says it's hormones and it's natural for these young people to engage in this activity.

Or it says, you don't have a right to judge that couple. Yeah they may not be married but they love one another But God says it not about biology it not about love it is passionate lust That the bottom line The selfish desire What is lust It the selfish desire to satisfy yourself regardless of another person or regardless of God's moral code. That's lust and that's our world.

That's the sexual ethic of our day is basically, hey, it's biology or it's love. God says, no, it's not. It's lust. Let's get the right word here, he says. And they live that way because they do not know God. They do not know God.

If you don't know God, of course you're going to give reign to your desires. Because there's nothing higher than your desires, right? You are what you are. You are what your desires tell you to do, is what our world is telling us today. So live in the live in authentic ways. Live according to your desires.

You don't know God. Why? Because God says, it doesn't matter what you desire, that doesn't define you and you don't do whatever you want to do. Get the right interpretation of our culture's ethic. It's not biology. It's not love.

It is passionate lust. Now, he doesn't just say, don't imitate the unbridled passions of unbelievers, but he says what? Control your body in holiness and honor. What does that mean? What exactly does he mean when he says that? Control your body in holiness.

He's meaning this. Use your body in the way that it was intended to be used. As consecrated to God. That is, your body has been set apart to God. It's His. Can I give you something here? listen your body does not belong to you it belongs to god you cannot do let me show you where i'm getting that turn over first corinthians first corinthians chapter six the apostle paul is writing about sexual immorality to the corinthians as well in fact just about in every epistle he writes this because he lived in a sex craze culture too.

Alright? Verse 18, chapter 6. Sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body, Christian, is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not, notice, you are not your own.

For you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. Have you ever thought that thought? Start thinking that thought. If you're a Christian, your body does not belong to you. It belongs to God.

And you can only do with your body not what you want. You can only do with your body what God says you can do with your body. It doesn't belong to you. And so when Apostle Paul here to the Thessalonians says, control your body in holiness, He means use your body as an instrument that has been consecrated to God, that has been set apart to God. It belongs to him.

Use it that way. Now let me illustrate it. When some material, you get this little bit of material, and it has a blue field with 50 stars and 13 red and white stripes, that piece of material has been consecrated or has been set apart or has been dedicated to one purpose. And that purpose is to represent our country, right? That's what it means. It's not just any other piece of cloth.

It's been set apart for a particular purpose. All right? So control your body in holiness. Use it as an instrument that's consecrated to God. He says control your body in honor. What is that all about?

Turn back to Romans 1 for a moment. Romans 1. Okay. Let's look just very quickly at Romans 1, verses 24 to 25. therefore god gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity to the to the notice dishonoring of their bodies among themselves because they exchanged the truth about god for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the creator who is blessed forever amen so he says when he gave them up to impurity to sexual impurity they then what dishonored their bodies What does he mean by this God does not intend bodies to be used that way He does not intend our bodies to be used in any kind of sexually immoral way So when you use them in such a way you dishonor those bodies All forms of sexual immorality not just homosexuality, but all forms of sexual immorality, premarital sex, adultery, whatever you want to put in there from the Bible, all forms of sexual immorality dishonor your bodies.

All right, so let's say you take that American flag and wash the windows with it. You've dishonored the flag, haven't you? Well, that's what God's saying here. Control your body in honor. Don't dishonor your body by using it for functions it was never intended to be used for. So we display our distinctiveness by self-control.

Third thing he says is display your distinctiveness by your refusal to swindle a brother or sister in Christ. You say, what? Yeah, look at that. All forms of immorality transgress or sin against a brother or sister by defrauding that brother or sister. Notice what it says that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter. Right.

That's an interesting phrase to wrong to sin against your brother by wronging him. Wrong. His brother is a word that means taking something that is not your own through deceptive means. taking something that is not your own through deceptive means. Sexual relations outside of marriage entails taking sexual possessions reserved for someone else. So in adultery, you're taking from that man or that woman something that belongs to his or her spouse.

You're defrauding that brother who's the husband of the woman you got the affair with. You're defrauding him. You're taking from him something that only he has possession of. In premarital sex, you're taking something that belongs to another future mate. Doesn't belong to you. Belongs to the future mate of that person.

You're swindling that other person. You say, but wait a minute, we're going to get married. Our intention is to get married. Well, it also means taking something that doesn't belong to you yet. you know if I went to the car dealer and I picked out a car and I took the keys and I said I pay you two weeks from today and drove off the lot What going to happen I'm in big trouble.

You know why? The car doesn't belong to me yet. And so when people say to me, yeah, but we intend to get married, you're defrauding that sister. Because you're taking something that doesn't belong to you yet. It's a swindle. And it often involves deception.

You know how? Our selfish sexual motives are masked by professions of love. Love does not disobey God. It's not love. The church will show its distinctiveness when it refuses to participate in the sexual swindling that is so common around us. we're not going to do it we're not going to be swindlers so God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives not only that verses 6 through 8 God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives for the right reasons for the right reasons what are those reasons?

He gives us three why should you live distinctive sexual lives? because of God's vengeance against such sins verse 6 that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter because the lord is an avenger in all these things as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you we live this way because of god's vengeance against such sins god will unleash his fury against all those who indulge in these kinds of sins every professed believer listen to me every professed believer who refuses to break off from those old practices and live like unbelievers will be judged as enemies of God. If you refuse to stop your sexual indulgence, you should have no assurance that you are a Christian. Because vengeance is coming on everyone who indulges in these things.

And this is a warning. This was a solemn warning from him. Do you notice that? He says, we solemnly warned you about this before. So when they were there on their first trip, when that mission team was with the Thessalonians, for the very first time they told him this. It was that important.

And it underscores the severity of it because he says we told you about it beforehand and I solemnly warning you again the vengeance of God is unleashed against all those who do these things Listen more times than I care to count I have had the solemn responsibility of warning people of this truth. There's the first reason for distinctive sexual lives. Vengeance against this kind of sin is coming.

Why should you live distinctive sexual lives? because of the call of the gospel. Verse 7. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Now, the gospel does not call you with a message that merely says, believe in Jesus and go to heaven. That's what some people think the gospel, that's all the gospel is about. Believe in Jesus and you get to heaven.

Here's your card. It's Jesus. I'm headed for heaven. The problem with that is that some people think you get on the Jesus road to heaven and you can drag all your baggage of sin with you on the trip. And that's not the case. Now, don't misunderstand me.

The gospel does not call you with this message. It does not call you with this message. Straighten up your life, get everything in order, purify your life, and then you'll be acceptable to God. That is not the gospel. That's not what I'm saying. The message of the gospel is this.

Believe in this Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, and He will deliver you from the guilt of your sin. Not your feelings, but the fact that you're guilty before a holy God. And if you trust in Jesus, who took the punishment for that guilty verdict, you are made right with God if you trust in Him. He deals with the guilt and the penalty that the guilt entails.

But the gospel also is this. believe in Jesus and he will save you from sin itself. He will deliver you from the miserable, enslaving power of sin in your life. Turn over to Matthew 1, verse 21. Here is the angel of the Lord, Gabriel, talking to Joseph. And he's telling Joseph about the birth of this son. He's thinking of putting Mary away.

You know the story. She's pregnant. and he's ready to divorce her and an angel comes and tells him this story or not this story, I'm sorry tells him the truth and he comes to verse 21 of Matthew 1 My favorite Christmas verse. She will bear a son, and you shall call him Jesus, for he will save his people from hell. Is that what it says? No, some of you are going, what?

Is that what it says? No, it says, and he will save his people from their sins. The gospel is the glorious good news that by the power of Christ, he will deliver you from your sins whether it's sexual immorality anger right your covetous heart the gospel comes and delivers you from your sin you see that's the gospel the gospel does not call us to impurity doesn't say believe in Jesus and you can live however you want till you get to heaven it says believe in Jesus and he will deliver you from the powerful sin that so has enraptured you that you love so much he will destroy those bonds of love and will give you a greater love and you will see sin for what it is he will deliver you from it that's the gospel a great marvelous joyful life as we progress against the enslaving power of sin so there's the second reason for distinctive sexual lives god calls you in the gospel to a holy life, not a life of impurity.

Here's the third one found in verse 8. Why should you live that kind of a life? Because of a divine person. Verse 8. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God who gives his Holy Spirit to you. Here Paul writes the conclusion.

Here's the final point that he makes. Here's the most important reason for obeying everything that he said up to this point. He says to disregard these instructions is to disregard God himself. Now, if you choose to disregard what I've said this morning, if you choose to disregard, if you're sitting there saying, oh brother, you know, I really like Pastor Tim, but he is nothing more than a prudish, uptight, out of date, old fashioned preacher.

Wow. It wasn what I was expecting Listen if you disregard what I said to you this morning then you rejecting God You're not just disagreeing with me. You are rejecting God himself. And listen, you're not rejecting just the will of God. You're rejecting God. Do you notice that he says that?

He doesn't say you disregard what God says. He says, you're disregarding God. You're rejecting God. And you're rejecting the God who's taken it upon himself to help you. You know, when he says, who gives his Holy Spirit to you? I think that's a reference to what he says in Ezekiel 36.

It's not just, he's just giving you the Holy Spirit. He's saying, this is the one who's undertaken to help you be this way. Look over at Ezekiel 36. This is a prophecy to the people of Israel about what's coming, telling them about what's going to happen, telling them about us, essentially. In 36, chapter 36, verses 26 and 27, notice what it says there.

We'll just take a little bit of this. And I will give you a new heart and a new spirit I will put within you, and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh, and I will put my spirit within you and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules. If you reject what this is saying, then you've rejected the God who has undertaken by his spirit to help you do this, to help you be this way, to help you abstain from sexual immorality and to honor your body, right?

And to stop swindling your brothers and sisters. He's given you the Holy Spirit that's going to help you do that, that will cause that to happen. You're rejecting the God who has undertaken to help you. Of course you've rejected God then. If you don't have anything to do with it, you don't have the very spirit that enables you to obey. You don't want to obey.

You've rejected God. So there's the final and most important reason for distinctive sexual lies. You're rejecting the God who commands that distinctiveness. I want to say one more thing to you before we close. Listen to me carefully you heard me and I want you to hear this last point God expects you to live distinctive sexual lives by grace Some of you hearing this might say I'm guilty of sexual immorality in the past.

What will happen to me? Because it's pretty clear what God says about this, isn't it? What's going to happen to me? Hear and respond to the good news of the gospel. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. God crushed his son because of your immorality.

He crushed his own son because of your wickedness. So that he took upon himself the vengeance that you deserve for your immorality. And he says if you believe in that son, your slate is wiped clean. You may have horrible sexual immorality in your past. You trust in Jesus and it will never come up with God again. Do you understand that?

That's the good news. Some of you may be hearing this and saying to yourself by this text I'm living a life of sexual immorality. What about me? And the answer to you is as God says repent of that sin. See it not as an expression of love. See it as an abhorrent thing before God that deserves the very vengeance of God.

That's how you must see it. But that's not all. He says, believe in My Son and He will deliver you from that vengeance and He will deliver you from that sin and He will give you a new life. A life that's better than the one that you're experiencing right now. and he'll deliver you from that. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed.

Behold, the new has come. He'll make you over all new again. Some of you may be saying, I do believe in Jesus and I love him and I hate my sin, but I feel trapped in my sexual sin. God says to you in the gospel, he says this, For the grace of God has appeared bringing salvation to all people training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions and to live self upright and godly lives in this present age God makes grace available to you.

God gives you grace that you have the power to live differently. You may have to find that grace in other people coming alongside you, to walk with you, to minister the word of God to you, but there's grace available to you. You can be free. Listen, friends. In a world gone crazy with sex, God expects His people to live a distinctively pure life. We display the power of the gospel when we do.

The power of the gospel which calls us to holiness. We show the nature of a holy God to a people driven by their desires because they do not know God. We proclaim that we refuse to use and exploit and swindle other people through sex. And that a good and joyful life comes with a life of self-control energized by the Spirit of God. May God help us by His grace to be this distinctive.

To be as distinctive as He's told us to be in this passage. by God's grace may he make us that way Father thank you for your word thank you for the good news that sexual immorality does not need to define us it does not need to control us that there is deliverance through Jesus and the good news that that sin that deserves the vengeance of God can be wiped clean from our record absolutely wiped out and total forgiveness given through Jesus. Just remember that. Give us grace to live holy lives.

To live in concert with the gospel that produces a people of God. We pray this in Jesus' name. Amen.