Our Vocation In The Family

We'll open your Bibles, if you would, to Genesis 3. I think we're going to start there. This past week, we had a fire retreat conference. I always thought it was a retreat, but they kept on calling it a conference. We were at, it was for men, a men's retreat out in Amish country. A lot of fun.

I had the privilege to preach one of the sessions there. And the subject for all three sessions was the man's vocation. And who here knows when I say, I don't know, maybe I shouldn't. I don't want to embarrass anyone. But who here knows when I use the word vocation theologically what that means? It's not a word we use very often, but it's a very needed thing to understand.

And I was able to give that, the man's vocation in the home or in the family. And then a few days ago it was decided that it would be better for me to preach because of Pastor Tim's different conditions. and so I didn't mean for that to be a joke. And I realized as I was saying it, it was going to sound like a joke. It wasn't. It's serious. It's not that serious.

Now I'm going too far the other way. All right. But I realized I didn't want to come up here and preach just to men, although that's necessary sometimes. So I tried my best to kind of tweak it a little bit to make it our vocation in the family. In other words, children, men, and women. And I know there's still some people left out because some people aren't married.

And so it's still good. If you're planning to become married one day, you need to listen. And if you don't think that's in the cards for you, it's still good for you to know what it looks like to help others who are married. And so I'm trying my best to make sure that this message is for all here on this Lord's Day. Let me begin in prayer to settle our hearts, mainly my heart.

Father in heaven, thank you, Lord, for this time that you have called us to gather. It is a good thing to gather in your name, and it's a good thing to have the word opened up. And I pray God that you would help me to proclaim how good it is that you have given us callings vocations that you didn just leave us to do whatever we desire here on this earth but you loved us enough to give us vocation, to truly enjoy what you've given to us.

And so I pray, God, that you would help me to be clear, and I ask that you would help the congregation's ears to be open, that there would be soft hearts and that they would receive any truth that might come forth from my lips and that it would change us as your means of grace does happen. I thank you, Lord, for your spirit, because we know that it's him that applies the work of Jesus and these things to our hearts. And so, God, I pray that you'd be with us in this great time of our need.

In Jesus' name, amen. Psalm 115, verse 16 says, The heavens are the Lord's heavens, but the earth he has given to the children of man. God is a very kind God. He is kind in all his ways to us, even to you. Whatever situation you may be in, it is very important for you to understand that God is kind. He is wonderfully kind.

He is so kind, he has given us this creation to enjoy him in. And given this creation to us, it is very important that he would teach us or show us how to enjoy this thing that he has given each one of us. And vocation is this doctrine of, it's another way of saying calling. God gives callings to each one of us in different areas of life. If you are a husband, you are given a God-given calling to be a husband.

If you're a wife, to be a wife. If you have parents, you have a vocation to be a child or your parents' children. However, best way to say that. We all have our own different vocations. We all have different callings that God has called us, each one of us. And it's a gift from God for us to enjoy what he has given us, this creation he has given us.

Imagine going to Cedar Point, being from Michigan. See, everyone who was at the retreat, they get to hear the same jokes again. Isn't that great? Isn't that great to have to hear the same stuff? God bless you. your patience. Being from Michigan, growing up, we were told the only good thing in Ohio is Cedar Point That the only good thing in Ohio And if you think about it Cedar Point is a very fun amusement park you know with the attractions and everything But imagine going there not knowing at all what going on and having no one to instruct you no one to run the rides just you were just to go and do it yourself.

That funness, all the pleasures and funds that would be in there would quickly be gone as you die on one of the coasters because you're not following safety protocols. You know, you have this fun thing, but there needs to be guidance, there needs to be rules. You need to know what's going on, right? Well, God gives us this creation. It's beautiful. It's wonderful for us to enjoy.

You know we are supposed to be happy Christians? We are. We're supposed to be happy. And he gives us calling so that we can enjoy this creation by glorifying him. There's one thing that this world needs is calling. This pagan world we live in, this world broken world we live in people do not realize that God has a calling on them to act in a certain way God expects you to answer the vocation the calling in a particular way to glorify him and enjoy him forever and people don't know that now because they reject God exists and so they cannot enjoy this creation as God has given us to enjoy that's why men refuse or boys refuse to become men we have a bunch of boys that will not become men because they don't realize that you have a calling on your life something that's significant that you can do that will give you fulfillment but instead boys don't realize that they're raised up without this idea of a calling from God and so their life is very insignificant and so they live a life in all sorts of fleshly desires.

Video games, not leaving their parents' basement at age 30, all this sort of things. They are boys, not men. It's plagued. I forgot to turn on my notes. I'm going to get in trouble if I don't follow my notes somewhat here. Women.

You know, women have a calling. You do. It's a calling from God, a very specific calling, depending on different circumstances in your life. But the world tells us that there is no calling from God Women aren't to be submissive. That's deeply backwards. You're not one of those people.

You're not fundamentalists, are you? And women, your roles that you are given in Scripture is actually looked at as backwards. It's actually demeaning that you should actually climb up to be a role of something else You see even the woman vocation is taken away from her in this society We live in children and adolescents They bored Why do children get in trouble?

They're bored. They're not told that they have a vocation from God that it is their delight and joy to fulfill. And so they're bored and so they get in trouble. As a youth, that's why I got in trouble, because I was bored. I had no deeper meaning. It was just all for my pleasures and fun.

I was bored and so I got in trouble. Our children are bored because they don't realize that they have a calling from God that it is their delight to fulfill. We all have vocation. And we all have a deeper meaning in life to fulfill that vocation, that calling from on high. You think about the greatest generation. When I say those words, what do you think of?

The greatest generation. You think of World War II, don't you? And why? Because the greatest generation, these men, boys becoming men, they had a calling that was deeply significant. They had to fight the atheistic, fascist regime that was spreading like wildfire across Europe. And they had to go there and end the evil.

What a calling that is. And they answered that call. And they have this nickname being the greatest generation. It caused them to become men. And the conflict brought about this rite of passage, if I may use that, to become men. We don't need World War III.

We don't. We don't need another world war. We don't need such a big conflict. Why? Because we have the greatest of conflicts. We have spiritual warfare.

We have that conflict going on every day. And it's not somewhere out in Europe or in the Middle East and Afghanistan and Iraq. But it's right here, right now in our homes. And it's a greater conflict, if I may say this, than World War II right now in your homes, every one of you. We have an enemy that wants to destroy you, that wants to lie to you and tell you lies about who you are and what your calling is from God.

And it wants to destroy you like cancer, hidden, deceptive, but nevertheless deadly. We have great conflict. and many times we can ignore it as it destroys us from within so we don't need world war ii we have a great calling today right now in this moment but we need to know it we need to know what God have for me in my vocation, how am I to fulfill it? Let it be your delight to look into that and to receive this calling on high and let it develop your character into a godly, mature person.

But do not ignore it, beloved, or it is your death and it is your family's death. So to explore this, explore this calling on high, I'm trying my best not to just make it about men. this is how this sermon was created after all. So please forgive me if it comes across that way. But men, most of all as the leaders of the home, needs to wake up. Every one of us needs to wake up.

Every morning we need to tell her. We need to pray to God because it's so easy for us to be leading well last week but then be completely off track today. Nevertheless, let's go to the beginning. Let's go to Genesis 3. Let's go to the first vocation that we see. The first calling from God and the first family as well.

I think it would be helpful because we'll see certain things happening that goes on today, too, that can help us today. I'm hoping to draw this out in a quick succession of time. This should be a series. Everything. Never have enough time, but beloved, let us not stop complaining about it and just do it. Genesis 3.

Now the serpent, we have this calling from God. Adam was to take care of the garden. We talk about this often, and we should. And that was his calling from God. Take care of this garden. And he was to do it in righteousness.

He was to be righteous. He was to protect the garden from unrighteousness. Right? And he had a family. He had a wife. That's a family right there.

Beginning of a family. And this is what his calling on high was to be. But the enemy comes. In Genesis 3, verse 1. Now the serpent was more crafty. Now, I don't...

I tell you right now, the first thing that the enemy will do to try to lie to you, say that this story isn't really true. A serpent? Come on. Let's be real. This actually happened. And this can tell you how it can take you to the serpent.

We need to listen to this. We need to believe it. We need to apply it. Now the serpent was more crafty than the other beasts of the field that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, look how this attack starts. did God actually say? Right Did God actually say Can you see that That questioning God word How much do we have people questioning God word today Oh it backwards to believe that this is all true Come on No way It backwards You going to be one of those weird bigoted fundamentalists God, did he actually say those things?

Come on. Did God actually say, says the wicked serpent? We may, did God actually say you shall not eat of any tree in the garden? Notice the strategy to create, to create a, well, maybe God didn't actually say these things. You know, and for your individual life, maybe God didn't actually call me to be a specific way. Maybe God didn't actually say that.

Maybe it is up to me to be any calling that I want. Maybe I don't have this God on high telling me to be a specific way. Maybe that is true. Maybe I have autonomy, a freedom within me. Maybe God didn't actually say. The woman, see him right here.

We'll find out later that the man seems to be there. Adam seems to be there. You know what Adam, I believe, should have done right there? It should have said, and the man said, yes, God actually said, now get out. Protected his family, protected his home. But we have the woman said to the serpent, we may eat, in verse 2, chapter 3 of Genesis, of the fruit of the trees in the garden.

But God said, You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it lest you die. Pretty good so far. Genesis 3, 4, But the serpent said to the woman, You shall not surely die. That is blasphemy. That is terribleness. That is taking what God had said and saying no.

And that is awful. It's blasphemous. It's something that we should take very seriously. that someone would deny the truth, the word of God, and insert their own lies. It's serious business. We'll get to more of that why later. You'll not surely die.

For verse 5, God knows that when you eat of it, your eyes will be open and you'll be like God, knowing good and evil. You see what the serpent's doing there. God had a specific calling for Adam and Eve. Do not do this, be like this. and the serpent says, God's limiting you. He's trying to limit you. You can be so much more if you just kind of have your own calling and you do your own thing do your own thing right So that is what the serpent does He denies the word of God and he denies he says the calling that God has given you to do it limits you It is not good for you You could be so much better if you just do this.

You could see how the echoes of this goes into our family today, right? It's the same stuff that is around us. Just use your head for a moment. You can see the same argument. Did God actually say? No, no, no, no.

He didn't say. You know what? It could be so much better if you just do it this way instead. Men, don't leave your homes. Don't worry about it. Be indifferent and watch TV all day.

Women, don't submit to your husbands. That's backwards. You need to be so much more. Children, be autonomous. Be your own person, right? Disney tells our children to follow their heart it's never wrong no, it is wrong you're depraved but let's do something else there's the serpent denying the vocation given to Adam and Eve what happens?

Genesis 3.6 so when the woman saw that the tree was good for food and that it was delight to the eyes and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of it and ate. What do we see there? Eve has a desire within her heart. It looks good. I want it. It tastes probably good.

Let's check it out. So instead of fulfilling the vocation she has got from God, that God's word has said, she has a desire that's contrary to that, and she says, let me take. Do you see how this works? Do you see how that's exactly how sin works today? Desire is not rooted in your calling from God, but desire is rooted in autonomy and rebellion against God.

Is that not how sin works today, beloved? You can listen to me, James 1, 14 through 15, but each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Desire is good, but not your own desire. God's desire for you, which makes it your desire. That's good. Your own desire, bad.

You're enticed by your own desire, rebellion against God. Then desire, when it has conceived, gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death Not just to you but to everyone you responsible for It has that influence of death on them Not good 1 John 2 if you look notice one thing in your studies notice how much sin has to do with your own desires. The desires of the flesh, right?

And it starts right here in the garden. It looked good to Eve, and so she took of it. She didn't remind herself of what her calling was, but instead she fulfilled her own wicked desires given by Satan at the beginning. So in Genesis 3, 6, at the end of it, she took the fruit and ate, and she also had to find Adam because he was busy doing something. No, it seems like Adam was there the whole time, which makes it like your typical 21st century husband today, completely indifferent, doing other things, not concerned that his wife is being destroyed in front of him right there. maybe adam wasn't there the whole time though who knows okay one result of this fall it's important for us when we talk about the family is look at genesis 3 16 to the woman he said i will surely multiply your pain and childbearing in pain you shall bring forth children and here's what i want to emphasize for just one moment your desire shall be contrary to your husband but he shall rule over you.

This idea, what's getting at here, is that the family, the most natural way for the family to function is for the man to lead and for the wife to submit. Yeah, that is natural. That is exactly how it should be. And if that's offensive to you, I would ask you just to keep your mind open a little bit to the word of God. It is a natural thing for the husband to lead, and we'll talk more about what that looks like, not in any way he wants, the husband to lead and for the woman to submit.

But here, all of a sudden, now the wife's desire is for, I would say, that leadership. All of a sudden, that doesn't become natural anymore. That's actually deeply offensive. But so we have this kind of, what do you call it, contention in the family now. No more is it natural for it to be that way, but now there's fighting. There is where the family should be an intimate place of peace, but now it's World War III in the homes. okay today today now we do not have a garden to take care of okay we do not have a garden to take care of but we have our homes we have our families we have our families we have our homes and we are to do something very particular with our homes our homes our families are to look like something very specific.

It is a calling from God that you have a family. And it's to look like something that he has determined for it to look like, not our own desires. It's to look like something. And it's to be a place where righteousness dwells. It is to be a place, just like Adam was to take care of the garden in righteousness, obedience to God, your home is to be a place where righteousness dwells. where the gospel, the second Adam, who didn't fail his vocation, but he succeeded in his vocation, we make our homes look like Christ in his kingdom.

That is our garden, so to speak. That is our duty. That is what we are doing in our families for righteousness to dwell here. But we have the same enemy and the same tactics. Did God really say that? No, no, no, no.

Husband, wife, child, you're to do it this way. It's better. It'll be better for you if you just do it this way. I thought for sure in my youth, drinking alcohol and going to parties was better for me. That's more fun. It's boring to be with you Christians.

For sure that was truth. Deception lies. It is better for you to be in rebellion. Satan said to my heart. And I believed it. And it was leading me to my death.

No, you're to do this instead. right it's the same lies and since we are falling in adam it grabs hold of our rebellious heart and tendency right our desires aren't naturally in god what a what how crazy is that our desires are naturally in rebellion so he speaks to our worldly flesh and if we are not aware of it if we're not on the attack if we're not offensive we're not aware of it we will be taken as prey Naturally. Naturally. Don't think that you'll be able to see it from all angles.

You won't. You will be getting destroyed in your family just like a hidden cancer, beloved. If we are not alert, if we are not looking at the word of God and letting it roll over us. So if I were to ask you, wife, husband, even children, if I were to ask you, what is the goal of your family? What are you trying to do? Husband and wife, you ought to have a goal. for your family.

I don't care if you have kids out of the house now. You should have a goal. What is our goal? What are we doing in our family You should be asking each other this Have deeper conversations What are we doing here What is this about What are we supposed to be doing What is the goal of your family And if it's only stuck, and I kind of say this often, I don't know how often, I've said it behind here, but whatever.

If it's only stuck in the physical, you know, I want a healthy 401k, I want children who do well in school, go to college, and make money. Here's my other joke. I keep on looking over here. Here's my other joke, okay, that I'm going to repeat. It's that I, all about, you know, we need to have physical mindedness, right? Like I have five kids.

I'm working on more so that one of them ought to be successful, make enough money so I can retire, right? So I can retire in their basement. So, I mean, I understand there should be a mindedness of physical things. I'm not saying to be so heavily minded you're no physical, so spiritual minded that you're no physically good. No earthly good. Yeah, I mean, that doesn't make any sense.

So there should be a reasonable understanding of the physical nature of everything, right? But the problem that I think many of us Christians are in is that the goal of our homes, of our family, is focused on the physical. It's focused on our children growing up and being successful. We tell our kids more about how you need to make money and go to school.

I was told over and over again, in order to be successful, you've got to go to college and get yourself $100,000 in the debt, blah, blah, blah. I was told what to be successful, but I wasn't told much about how to be successful in the kingdom of Christ. I think a lot of times we can be focused, and it's so easy, on the physical things, while the spiritual things of our vocation from God gets deeply neglected.

And our goals in our home reflects that. What has God told us to do? Colossians 3, 1 through 2, If then you have been raised with Christ, If you're a Christian, if you, beloved, call yourself a Christian, then seek the things that are above, where Christ is. You love Christ so much he's up there, and you want to seek him. That's your desire. He's seated at the right hand of God.

Set your minds on the things that are above, not on the things of earth. As Paul's saying, don't worry about the earth at all. No but he saying let your focus be on the spiritual and let everything else fall into place That what we get in Matthew 6 25 I don have time to go through the whole thing but you remember that Jesus is saying, stop worrying. Stop worrying about what you're going to wear, what you're going to eat.

The pagans worry about that kind of stuff. Your God knows that. Your Father knows that. Don't worry about that. Stop being anxious. But see, a lot of people don't read on to the antidote, to what Jesus then tells you to do.

And what does Jesus then tell you to do? He says in verse 33, but seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and then all those things, the physical things, will be added. It will be there. Sometimes we face martyrdom and hardships and everything. Indeed. But whenever our focus is on the physical and we don't focus on the spiritual, that is death indeed.

We are called as Christians to not be like the pagan that denies the spiritual world altogether. But we are called to look to Christ who is seated at the right hand of the Father and let our vocations be set in that, our focus to be in that. And then everything else, let it fall off of that, through that. Now there's all sorts of different things we could talk about, what that actually looks like when the rubber hits the road.

But there is that theological general truth right there. Is your family, your goal with your wife or whatever it may be, your children, if you're a single parent, is your goal that this household would be seeking first the kingdom of Christ so that everything else can flow from that? Or are we seeking the things of the earth primarily? Isn't that what Satan told Eve to do?

Eve tried answering, no, no, we have a vocation from God to not do that. And Satan says, no, no, don't worry about that. Just eat the things of this world, right? Just take the things of this world. The devil is always trying to get you off the vocation that you have from the Lord and just your desires and the fleshly things of the world focus on the things of the world.

It is a trick from the evil one. So as individuals, we are to seek first the kingdom of Christ, and all the niceties of this life, we'll organically follow from that. And a family is made up of individuals gathered together, and it has the same goal to seek first the kingdom of Christ. Now, I think a great trick of Satan is to make a home look well put together, but the goal of that well-looked, you know, the home that looks nice, but the goal of it is nothing to do with the kingdom of Christ Everything to do with the kingdom of the world I want to be careful how I say it I almost didn say this part I'm going to say it.

Tim, correct me. Just right away, come up and correct me. The crack house that gets their kids taken away is serving the domain of darkness just as the morally sound home that does not have the service and worship of Christ at its center. Now, one may be worse than the other, but both are serving the domain of darkness. If you are not serving the kingdom of Christ, you are allowing the domain of darkness to take root in your home, even if it looks beautiful and polished off to the world outside.

You get what I'm saying? In our age of religious degradation, going downhill, most Christian homes have enough morality to keep from being the crack house, but not the fortitude to be a bastion of kingdom activity. They have enough morality to not look like that crack house, but they don't have enough kingdom activity to be a bastion of gospel warmth.

And so one generation of Christian family fails to produce the next. 70% of our children are leaving the faith. They're leaving the religion once they get out of the house. Now, it's all different reasons. I'm not trying to say if your child has left the faith, that means you did everything wrong. But that whole number, 70% of our children are spending two decades in our homes, and they decide that it's not warm enough there, and so they leave.

There is something seriously wrong with that. That should cause us to repent. Eyes filled with tears. What's going on here? Why are our children leaving for the pagans? Their worldview stinks.

There's nothing good about it. Why are they going there? because there is something going on in our families. It's not gospel. It doesn't have the warmth it should have where they want to come in. There's something going on with that statistic, at least generally speaking. We need to stop blaming the world.

Stop blaming college. College didn't take your kid. College didn't do that. It was just a circumstance that drew your kid away. But a kid goes away, they should feel like a certain sense of, man, it was much warmer. The gospel light was much better than this stuff, this dribble that I've been doing now.

It should draw them back. But when there is no gospel warmth, they don't have nothing to go back to. We need to stop blaming the world. We need to stop blaming college. We need to stop blaming those things. And we need to ask ourselves, did am I leading my family to gospel warmth?

Or did I just send my kids or go with my wife to church in a building at a certain time, but then in the intimacy of my home where no one can see, there was no gospel warmth at all there. Beloved, that is going to destroy you and your family. And it has. And it's continued to do so until we change something. I don't have time to do it. If you look, I find it interesting, in your own study time, Joshua 24, 14 through 16, we got that famous line from Joshua, right?

He says, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. It's beautiful, right? It's good. But notice what he says at the end of 14. He says, or I always lose it. I lost it last time and I didn't learn my lesson.

He says in verse 15, and if it is evil in your eyes, he's talking to the Israelites, to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve. What's so interesting about this? He says, choose this day, Israelites, who you're going to serve. Is it going to be the gods in Canaan that we're about to take out, or is it going to be Yahweh? Notice he doesn't say, choose this day if you're going to serve Yahweh, but he says, choose this day who you're going to serve.

Why is that so significant? Because, beloved, your household is going to serve something. You're either going to serve God, and if you're neglectful to that, then you will serve the domain of darkness. There is no gray area. There is no, well, you know, I'm not against God. Well, if you're not for him, you're against him, right?

And so I find it interesting that Joshua chooses to say who, not if, who. Are you going to serve in the domain of darkness, or are you going to serve in the beloved kingdom of our dear Lord Jesus Christ? I hope it's said about every one of us here that I will serve the Lord. I'm not going to serve the domain of darkness. I am going to be actively serving the Lord and looking out for different ways the kingdom of darkness is coming in and creating division and making that gospel warmth be dampened.

I'm searching every way where that's happening and I'm destroying it. May it be said of all of us that that is our desire because the kingdom of Christ is too good to mess up It too warm It too inviting It too good to see your children walking in the faith to see your wife and your greatest desire is to see her growing in the Lord and loving her in that way. But of course, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Let's go. If you will, don't quickly. Just take your time. Ephesians 5, 22. What does it mean, then? What does it mean? one could say that that was a 30 minute introduction but i'm you know it we're it won't be that long beginning of a family is a marriage it's the beginning of a family in ephesians 5 22 through 33 we're going to just see this very hate to say it but very quickly to see what is our vocation What is a wife called to do?

What is a man called to do? What is a husband called to do? When we see in Ephesians 5, 22, Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. That's clear, isn't it? You submit just a little bit. No, no, no.

As the church submits to the Lord, so wives, submit to your husbands. No matter how unpopular that gets, we will proclaim that. Because that is the good things that God has for you. It's for you to have a heart of submission to your husband. Okay? Even when you're, and we could talk about it, it could be a whole sermon, but even when your husband is difficult, it is good to have a heart of submission to him as you are doing it to the Lord.

Even masters who have servants, servants are told to submit to their slave owners as they're doing it to the Lord. There is a heart of submission, and you're doing it to the Lord. Wives, you are called to submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and himself its Savior.

Now, as the church submits to Christ, in Ephesians 5.24, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. That's scary. It is. 1 Peter, I think, says women do not fear anything because it is a fearful thing to have to submit to a human. It is. It's fearful. and there's this idea that you are given a God-given calling to do something that is not easy to submit.

Now of course if you in danger I always got to say this if you in danger if your husband is physically attacking you and your life is at stake that doesn mean you just take it right You get into safety But you are to submit even when it difficult Even when your husband is difficult, you are to submit because that is your God-given calling. It is a glorious thing for a wife to be patient in that. You will get crowns.

You will get rewards for being such a godly woman. There's much more that could be said about that, but my speech a couple days ago was on men, not women, and so that's what I'll give you there. Verse 25, why are wives to submit? What's going on so that the husbands can do his job more openly, if that makes sense, or without objects, okay? Wives, you submit so that the husbands can do their job and there's not a bunch of conflict and obstacles in the way.

Husbands, what are you to do? Husbands, verse 25, you have a calling that is very specific. You do not lead your wives with a hard hand or any way you want to do because you have a calling from God and you are to fulfill it for the good of you and your wife, for the glory of God. And what is that? Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. That should make you husbands swallow hard.

How in the world am I going to love my wife as Christ loves the church? That should make you fall down on your knees each morning asking God to guide you because this is far too much for you. And if it just causes you to be like, eh, I would, beloved, ask you to repent. It is a lofty thing that husbands are to do. They are to love their wives so much as Christ loves the church.

That is a lofty ideal. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. Well, how did he show his love? What does he go on to say in verse 25? And gave himself up for her. Why?

Why did Jesus do that? Why did he give himself up for his bride, for his church? That he might sanctify her. Sanctify means to separate. So Jesus has a bride and he separates this bride away from everyone else. And what does he do with that separated body of people?

Well, it goes on to say, having cleansed her by the washing of water and the word. So what does Christ want to do with his bride? He wants to separate it away from the rebellion of all mankind. And he wants to sanctify this body. That is to get the sin out of her To get the sin out of her And what does he use as his means or his tools The word of God the truth You see how Satan took away people with the lie with deception, with falsehood?

Jesus does the opposite, reverses it, and separates the people, sanctifies them by the word of truth, by the gospel. Sanctifies his bride. applies the work that he has done on the cross through the word of truth. This is what he's doing. So that he might, in verse 27, present the church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that she might be holy and without blemish.

As a Christian, Jesus wants you to be holy. And Jesus is your husband, and so you say, it is my delight to follow him in holiness. Because that's his desire for you, beloved. but look at in verse 28, in the same way, so like that, like the example that Christ has given us, in the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies, right? Because your bride, husbands, is your own body.

You have left your other household, and you became one flesh with your bride, and so in the same way that Christ loves the bride, so husbands, you are to love your bride too. What does it mean to love your bride then? What does it mean to have love for is not to make sure you get her stuff on Valentine's Day and on your anniversary, although that's obviously part of it, but you see your bride in the kitchen cooking, you see your bride taking care of your children, and you say, I want her to be holy.

I want the word of God to be here. God uses the word to sanctify his bride, and I want to use his word too. I want the word, I want the gospel truth to be here. I don't want Satan's lies. I don't want my wife to be taken away with that, with all the lies of Satan. I want the word of God to flourish here.

That is loving your wives, not leading her with a heavy hand, right? Not leading her any kind of fickle way that your heart desires. You're irritated with certain things, and so now you lead her in a way based off your irritation, not based off of the kingdom of Christ and the word of truth. you lead your wife into the kingdom of christ that is true love right there that is true love and man that is difficult but it's a lofty call and christ is our leader he's the one who has done it, who is doing it.

And so we grab hold of his ankles and we say, help me, Lord Jesus Christ. Men, and I say this often too, men, do not let your morning devotions be boring. You have far too many sins to repent of and take to Christ for your time alone with Christ to be boring. If it's boring, that means you are not pointing out your sins to the Lord as he washes you clean and guides you into further holiness to do your job well.

Do not have boring time with the Lord. Repent of that, because that means that Satan is hiding sins from your eyes. My greatest times of worship is when I'm repenting and Christ is healing me. Verse 28, in the same way as husbands should love their wives as their own bodies, he who loves his wife loves himself, because she's part of his body now. for no one has ever hated his own flesh but nourishes it and cherishes it just as christ does his body the church because we are members of his body therefore man in verse 30 continue on shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to the wife and the two shall become one flesh this mystery is profound and i'm saying that refers to christ and the church however let each one love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband so that the husband can lead the wife well.

Wife, if you're not submissive and your husband's trying to lead you into holiness, it's going to make his job hard. And sometimes, and by the way, wives, you lead your husbands too into holiness. It goes both ways. Husbands, we tend to get blinded to certain things. Lovingly, in submission, point out the sins, right? It goes both ways.

Husbands, you are to be on guard for those sins in your wife. and your wife. Anywhere to lovingly bring her out. Wives, submit. Do not fight him on these things. Talk with him. Talk about it.

Come into agreement. Look into the Bible. Go to your pastor. Do all those things. But don't just automatically fight your husbands because he might bring something to your attention. Again, it goes both ways.

Wives, make sure you do it in a very submissive way, in a way that's very much respecting your husbands. But point out sin. point out these things that are causing the domain of darkness to take root instead of the kingdom of Christ. Nevertheless husbands our goal wives our goal is that the word of God would stand supreme Where the lies of Satan take root naturally we set up the word of God as supreme It is everything to us.

It's not just something that we say as Christians that makes for a good bumper sticker, but it is something that our house is a house that serves the Lord and his word is supreme here because this is the tool Jesus uses to make you clean. Husbands, when is the last time you asked your wife how her devotions are going? When is the last time you asked your wife, what have you been reading in Scripture?

What are you battling right now? How often our marriage is rooted in just talk that doesn't go any further than the weather. When's the last time, husbands, you asked your wife how it's going? And if she's not doing it, when's the last time you first went to the Lord and asked you to be used as a tool to bring her to do it? And then lovingly lead her in that green pasture.

Pastors, oftentimes, they say that their burden is to know Scripture better so they can then give it to their congregation in a way that, well, husbands, you are the pastor of your wife. Your burden should be to know the Word of God so you can lovingly teach her and bring her along. but how often, and I am guilty of this too, are we rather interested in sports facts than video games? We should want to know the word of God so we can lovingly give it to our wives.

Our conversations should be enriched with the word of God. The gospel should flow out of us, the warmth. And we can see our calling with our children. Very quickly, Ephesians 6, 1. Children, obey your parents and the Lord for this is right. We want our children to be submissive and to obey.

I don't know if you know this, but your child is depraved. And they don't want to submit. And so you must train them to. But why are you doing it, parents? Are you doing it because it's just annoying when your kids are disobedient? I find myself, that's why I want to discipline.

Because they're annoying me. Stop annoying me. That's not why we discipline. That's not why we want our kids to be obedient. Because we want our kids to enter into the kingdom of Christ. Same thing with our wives We want our wives to be sanctified We want to lead our wives in a way that sanctifying her Well same thing with our children We want them to be sanctified in Christ And so we teach them, you must be obedient to me, child, so that I can lead you to our Lord.

I try to talk to my son when I got to be in a way that's, I got to spank him or I got to do something I know he's not going to like. I try to show him, this is why I'm doing this. I'm not doing this because I'm just irritated with you. I'm doing this because I'm trying to lead you to Christ. And so when he realizes that, when that clicks in his head, when they're old enough, they realize, yes, this is good for me.

This is good for me. This isn't just because you're just randomly disciplining me because you're angry. This is because you are loving me. They will see that if you teach them that. They are to be obedient so that in chapter six, verse four of Ephesians, fathers, it's mothers too. But fathers, you are to be leadership over this process.

That's why I think he's talking to fathers here, but it's mothers here too. Fathers, do not provoke your child to anger. Don't you dare use their obedience and provoke them to anger with it, because that will cause them to be bitter. And we do that whenever we are setting up a standard that is our standard, and they'll see through that, and they'll be bitter for that.

They will. They'll get old enough, they'll realize that mom and dad just disciplined me in a way that was arbitrary. It was in their emotions. It was their own kingdom that they built up that they wanted me to submit to. They'll know that and they'll be bitter. Do not embitter your children.

What are you to do instead? But bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord and the kingdom of Christ and the word of truth. And when your kids see that this is where you're guiding them, this is where you're leading them, they will see that there is green pasture here. There is warmth here. I want this. I need this discipline.

They will see this if you are patient with them and you show them that. Far too often though, we train our kids up in our law, and they get bitter. It's the same thing, though, isn't it? We are to bring them up, not in the lies of Satan, but in the word of truth. We are to sanctify our wives, not with the lies of Satan, but in the word of truth, but in the gospel, but in the word.

The word is to be dominant in our homes. Now, now, application, As we finish this, Deuteronomy 6 4 Deuteronomy 11 18 we see that the general environment of your home the environment of your home, just the way your home feels, the way your family feels in your home, the general environment of your home must be to teach, proclaim, and celebrate and worship the word of truth. God's word.

God himself. That is the feeling you want in your home. The atmosphere of your home. You want to be full of worship. Full of the word of truth and how it guides us. I'm going to read it real quick.

Deuteronomy 6, 4-9. Notice. Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. You, beloved, shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your might. See how it starts in you individually. I love the Lord in my heart so much.

And these words I command you today shall then from that organic worship in your heart shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house or when you walk by the way or when you lie down or when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and you shall be as frontlets between your eyes.

You shall write the word of the Lord on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. Now, should we all go out and do that with everything? No. The point is, it needs to be everywhere. Whenever you're just hanging out on your porch, you should see the gospel everywhere. And you talk to your son and your wife about the gospel that you see.

The beautiful sun going down, and you talk about how good God has been to us today. Right? The point is that you should love the Lord so much within your heart that you can't help but see the gospel everywhere. And you talk about it. It comes forth from you. It's the environment of the home.

It's when your kids come in, they're breathing in gospel environment, and they're breathing out worship, right? This is what you should want. And I would argue, and there's so much that could be said more about that, it starts in your own private life. It starts, beloved, in your own private life. You need to have that worship in your own heart. If you do not have it, don't expect it to be in the environment of the home.

It won't be there, and we know that. It needs to be that you need to wake up and have that time with the Lord, whatever during the day it is, right? You fall down on your knees and you say, Christ, heal me today. Show me my weakness. Let me see you as beautiful and wonderful. And then in that, let me worship you as being so good to me, right?

And then that just kind of comes out of you throughout the day. Your wife breathes it in, your children breathe it in, and they're worshiping too, right? And I think for a very practical, I'm going to end here with this because I'm running out of time. I think a very practical step in this, very practical, because what I'm saying is you want your environment to be one of worship.

And a way that you can set the day off right with your family is to start in a family worship time, okay? If our desire is for the kingdom of Christ and the word of God to be proclaimed and to be exalted and be the general feel in the home, I suggest, beloved, that in your family there should be a time where you come together and you worship God explicitly together. This is a time that you come together and you read God's word, you sing God's word with hymns, and you pray God's word.

Because you're setting the tone for the rest of the day. This is going to be the atmosphere of my home. Now, one thing I would say, and I want to be careful, because this looks like different. this looks different everyone's home but i do think it's good i think if you look in church history this is the apostolic age you look at the reformation they took family worship very seriously they look at it as a staging ground as as a is i don't know how to say a staging ground might be right but as a way to start the day off in this to create this environment in the home as they open the word together as a family as they sing praises together as a family as they pray together as a family.

And I would say that this is the first application, this is the first practical step that you could take to make that environment in your home, is to have family worship consistently in your home. And it's not just for children. You should be doing it individually. But if you have a husband and wife, that's a family. Do it together. I'm telling you, that will create a unity, a bond, and where conversations are brought out there with the Word of God open.

You have children. Do it with your children. You should want to encourage them to talk about their day, to talk about their hardships, to talk about what they're thinking and everything with the Word of God open during that time of family worship. There's much more that could be said about that, and I don't have time to say it. do I think it's a very quickly do I think it's a litmus test if you're not doing family worship your family? no but I do think it's a very practical step with the desire for your house to be a kingdom of Christ activity going on it's a very good way to settle our hearts as a family together and then go forth from that and I'll end it with that God in heaven thank you so much you know what I can end it with that If you are very quickly if you are thinking this is too much for me I can't do this.

This sort of vocation from God is lofty, and it's too much for me. Can I say something real quick? Good. That is a good feeling to have. Good. Because that drives you to prayer.

It drives you to Christ. It is too much for me. It is too much for you. You can't do it, beloved, but Christ empowers you to do it. Anytime we realize that we're weak and Christ is strong, that is a good day. And so if you're thinking in this moment, I can't, there's no way.

Beloved, good. Go to Christ. Cry out to him. Say, empower me by your gospel, by your spirit, to have such a love for the gospel that it flows out in my family. We have pastors here that are wanting to help you. You have deacons.

You have elders. You can utilize them. it is good to need the Lord and he will meet you. I promise you when you go to him in repentance and desire to grab hold of him he won't let you down. He never does. God in heaven thank you so much for the gospel. Thank you so much for Jesus Christ our Lord.

I can think of how much Lord this lofty calling is something that I failed to even come close to But I know Lord that in that I can then go to the Lord Jesus Christ I can go to you and you comfort me by empowering me Lord to gather me up and to bring me into greater conformity to Christ so that when I lead my family, I do it in a way that honors you. I'm thankful that you are a God who does this. You don't tell us to do a bunch of things that are too hard for us and say, well, good luck.

You don't do that, Lord, but you tell us to do it and then you empower us to do it. So I pray, God, that as people before me and me, myself, we would see that we have a vocation in our homes, that it is a serious vocation and it is difficult and hard, but glorious at the same time, because Christ Jesus in his kingdom, by his word, empowers us to do it so that our families become a family of kingdom activity. So I pray that that would be the desire of the husbands and wives here.

I pray that it would be the desires of the children. I pray it would be the desires for everyone in this church that we would have families here who love the Lord so much that it is just in the environment of the family itself. Lord, if any of my words were untrue, I pray that they would be forgotten. And I pray that your truth, anything that I said was true, it would be grabbed hold of and be celebrated.

Thank you so much for your grace. In Jesus' name, amen.